Again
by yesliterally
Summary: I get up in the morning, go to work at 8, and am home by 6. I'm alone and I'm miserable and I know that's my own fault. But I'm sick of it." Izzie comes back after four years to ask a favor of her ex-husband. EPILOGUE & ANNOUNCEMENT POSTED!
1. Chapter 1

**AGAIN**

_So it's been a LONG time since I've written and posted anything. I could blame it on my hectic schedule, but mostly I blame it on Shonda and her determination to ruin Alex and Izzie for me. Recent spoilers are not helping either. Despite what's going on with the show and my favorite couple right now, I needed to write out a way to fix things. And then it took on a life of its own. So read and enjoy (or at least I hope you do). **Read and Review!!! **_

Oh, and I don't own anything, and if I did, Shonda would have been fired years ago.

* * *

It had been four years since she had darkened the doors of Seattle Grace-Mercy West Hospital.

She looked up at the sign, thinking back to the merger that ultimately caused her dismissal from the residency program. That old anger threatened to boil up in her stomach, but she pushed it aside, taking a deep breath and moving forward into the glass and steel structure. She was unsure of how this would go, how he would react. But she had to do this. It was only fair, only right.

Exiting the elevator on the familiar surgical floor, it scared her a little bit to realize that the faces around her were all so unfamiliar. It was so different from her time here when she knew everyone and everyone knew her.

She made her way over to the desk, eventually gaining the attention of a nurse, who couldn't be more than 22 or 23. "Can I help you?"

Izzie nodded. "I need to see Dr. Karev. It's important." The girl nodded, and looked at the schedule on the computer. There was no judgment in her demeanor. It made her grateful that she hadn't been forced to ask someone who knew, or thought they knew, what happened between her and her ex-husband.

"He's in surgery right now," the nurse said, as a tiny bit of sadness crept into Izzie's soul. "It shouldn't be too much longer, though, if you'd like to wait in the waiting room for him." She smiled slightly at the girl and turned, searching for a chair where she could hide from her former friends and co-workers. She didn't need to see them. Just him.

She hadn't spoken to him in years, despite a few voice mails they each left for each other when the divorce was finalized. There was nothing personal or intimate about any of the messages, just simple goodbyes, and seeming attempts for closure. That was all they were. She would never admit to anyone, even him, that she had never deleted his last one.

A tear crept down her face as she stared at the wall, trying to keep her emotions in check. She was scared, not knowing how he would take her request, if he was even willing to see her. She knew that he had likely moved on, certain that there had been other women. He was Alex Karev, after all. But had he moved on so much that he was settled and happy? Had he remarried? Or met a woman that wouldn't run out on him? A better woman than she ever was?

All the thoughts running through her mind stilled, when his voice rang out behind her.

"Izzie."

-------------------

"Great job as usual, Dr. Karev." Dr. Arizona Robbins smiled at her protege as they scrubbed out of a particularly difficult transplant surgery on a three-year-old. "Keep this up and I'll be out of job when you become an attending."

She winked at him and exited the scrub room as he watched the nurses and the techs carefully move the little girl from the table back onto the gurney. This had been a tough one. A sweet, beautiful little girl who would never live to see kindergarten without a new kidney. Her ten-year-old brother donated his. He had doubted his choice to follow Dr. Bailey's advice and go into pedes on many occasions, but not now. He knew he was where he belonged, doing the job that he was born to do.

He couldn't help but think that his own tragic childhood made him perfect for this job. That he could keep his patients from feeling all the pain he felt as a kid. And kids didn't judge him. He could look them in the eyes and not feel like a complete failure. It was the only time he didn't feel like that.

The last four years of his life had been about nothing but work. Advancing his career. Catching up with Meredith by publishing with Dr. Robbins. Being as hardcore as Cristina. He, somewhere along the line, had truly become one to watch. He didn't split his time between work and home. Work was home, and it was a pattern that he had settled into nicely.

Sure there had been nights at Joe's and one night stands with random, willing women. But that was the extent of his personal life. He was okay with that because every time he woke up with another woman in his bed, he still felt empty. It still bothered him when the woman wasn't blonde or her eyes weren't a specific color of brown. Not that he'd ever admit it to anyone. He'd moved on the only way he knew how after she cut him so deeply.

The girl was wheeled out of the OR, and he finished scrubbing out, mentally noting that he'd have to check on her in an hour. Until then, sleep.

"Dr. Karev?" The voice of a young nurse pulled him from his thoughts. He looked up at the tiny dark-haired girl walking toward him. "There is a woman asking for you. She said it was important."

"Who was it?"

"She didn't leave a name. Pretty blonde. Brown eyes. She's waiting in the waiting room." The nurse disappeared into a patient's room with the shrug of her shoulders.

He knew in his mind that the description he had been giving could have been anyone. A patient's mother, perhaps. Or another doctor interested in the article he had published with Dr. Robbins. But his heart couldn't help but pound at the thought that it might be Izzie. He hadn't heard from her in over three years. Hadn't seen her in four. It was doubtful that she would just show up unexpected like this. He wasn't sure whether to be happy at the prospect or not.

He took a deep breath and headed into the waiting area. It took him only seconds to find her, even with her facing the wall at the far side of the room. Her hair was longer, but he knew it was her.

Keeping his well-trained voice in check he called her name.

"Izzie."

-------------------

She wiped her face, hoping he wouldn't notice the moisture left there from her tears. Then she turned to look at the man she'd left behind so many years ago. It didn't surprise her that he was even more handsome than before, despite a few more wrinkles around his eyes. "Alex." She watched as a touch of a smile made its way onto his face and she felt a sense of relief wash over her.

She looked better. So much healthier than the last time. Her face had filled back out and her skin wasn't ashen and she didn't look like she'd spent months in a hospital bed. She reminded him so much of the young girl he'd met at the mixer at the beginning of their internship. Then as she said his name, all the memories of what they went through, what they put each other through, came flooding back to him. He put the wall up again, and stopped looking at her like the only woman he'd ever fully given his heart to. "What do you need, Izzie?"

The sudden change in his voice, in his demeanor, scared her a little bit. This wasn't going to be easy. She knew him, knew what he was doing. He was bracing himself against her, not letting her in. This was exactly what she didn't want to happen. "I need your help." She looked around the busy waiting area. "Can we go somewhere a little quieter?"

He nodded at her request, clearly understanding that whatever she wanted from him, it wasn't something that the whole hospital should be privy to. He had been the one who had to deal with the gossip after she left him, the sympathetic looks, the judgment. She hadn't had to go through that, and he didn't want to do it again. So he lead her up to the roof, to the place that had become his spot. He'd sat there and signed the divorce papers, sat there when he left her the last voice mail, sat there after the first time he slept with someone else. It was his place to think because everywhere else reminded him of her. He realized too late that he'd have to find another new spot after this.

They made small talk as he led her to the roof, which in an odd way, comforted her.

"So, how have you been?" he asked, looking straight ahead.

"I've been in remission officially for two and a half years. No recurrences. I still get checked every six months but, as far as my doctors can tell, I'm doing fine."

"Good."

"What about you?"

"Stayed busy. I've been working with Dr. Robbins for a few years. Focusing on pedes."

"I know. I read the article. It was good. Very good."

Silence and awkwardness engulfed them again. She looked around, out over the skyline of Seattle, moving to rest her arms against the wall. "I've forgotten how beautiful this city is."

He watched as she took in the view, warm summer breeze floating through her hair and he knew that if he watched much longer, the walls would crumble and his defenses would be useless. "What do you need my help for, Izzie?"

She sighed, not turning her gaze away from the sunlit bay. "I'm a secretary, Alex. At a law firm. I live alone in a tiny apartment in Chehalis. I never see my mother anymore because we really don't do well living in the same city. I get up in the morning, go to work at 8, and am home by 6. I'm alone and I'm miserable and I know that's my own fault. But I'm sick of it."

Alex was about to ask what any of this had to do with him, why she drove all the way up here to tell him this when she turned to look at him and continued.

"I want to have a baby."


	2. Chapter 2

**AGAIN**

**Chapter 2  
**

_Wow! Thanks for the reviews, guys! I'm really glad so many are liking this story. Clearly I'm not the only one working on dealing with the Alex/Izzie withdrawals that the show is driving us all to. Anyway, hope you continue to enjoy this story and **if you keep reviewing, I'll keep writing**!_

* * *

_"I want to have a baby."_

The words hit Alex like a bucket of cold water as he stared at her.

She knew that he was shocked by the look on his face. She hadn't wanted to spring it on him quite like this, but she also knew that he wasn't a guy who liked for people to beat around the bush. "I know that wasn't what you were expecting to hear from me. I'm sorry I sprung it on you like that. I've been thinking about it a lot, Alex. I almost died and now I have nothing to live for. I was stupid when I left you and when I left Seattle. I know that now. I also know that I can't just snap my fingers and have that back. You don't owe me anything. But I need this. And I need you to be okay with it."

He continued to listen as her words sunk in. She was asking him for permission to use the not-quite-forgotten embryos stored away in some lab somewhere.

"The embryos ... They won't last forever, and they're my only chance now of ever having something, someone to live for. Please Alex. At least think about it. I know it's a lot to deal with, but I'm not asking for any more than your signature. I won't expect anything else from you."

He swallowed trying to keep his emotions in tact. Part of him wanted to yell at her, to ask her if she was crazy. That part was warring with the part of him that still cared about her and wanted her to be happy. And deep down in his heart, was the tiniest flicker of hope. But at that moment, he couldn't make a decision this big. Too many things were going on inside him. "I need to think about it. Come back here tomorrow and we'll talk."

She watched helplessly as he turned away, and disappeared into the stairwell that led back into the hospital. Tears stung her eyes as she looked back over the bay, praying that he would help her this one time.

* * *

After passing the transplant follow up to a fellow resident, Alex changed and exited the hospital in record time. The place was too full of memories he thought he had forgotten, but had in the past hour reared their ugly heads. He needed to think this through, to talk to someone, and he couldn't do that with memories assailing him in rapid fire.

As the sun began to set, he sped out of town as quickly as he could and without much thought found himself turning onto a driveway that lead past the trailer that he hated so much. Beyond the trailer was a beautiful Victorian style home. He parked in the driveway, climbed the steps and rang the door bell over and over. His patience was wearing thin when the door finally flew open.

"Alex, what the hell? I was giving Georgia a bath." Meredith stood there holding a towel covered toddler, annoyed eyes staring up at him. As she looked him over, she saw the pained expression on his face, one she had become all too familiar with four years ago. Her voice softened. "What happened?"

"Unca Awex!" Blue eyes looked at him from under the pink towel as the little girl reached out to be held. Typically he'd pick her up and toss her into the air, much to the child's delight, but at that moment, she did nothing but scare him. Meredith moved aside as he walked into the house.

"I need to talk to you." His eyes parlayed the fact that this wasn't a quick conversation.

"Why don't you go in the kitchen and fix some coffee. I'll put Georgia to bed." He nodded and she disappeared up the stairs, trying to explain to a three-year-old that Uncle Alex didn't feel like playing tonight. He rubbed his hand down his face when he heard that, guilt gnawing at him, and moved into the kitchen. He had no trouble finding his way around the massive kitchen, as he spent more time in this kitchen than he did the tiny one in his own apartment. Meredith was always making sure he didn't work every holiday and he'd spent a good many nights in the guest room.

He was seated at the island with two cups of coffee poured by the time Meredith joined him. "You owe my daughter some awesome Uncle Alex time very soon," she said as she slid onto the bar stool next to his.

"Sorry about that." He cringed at the thought of upsetting Georgia.

"So what happened? You haven't looked this bad since ..." she hesitated. "Since the divorce was finalized."

"She's back, Mer."

"What?"

"Izzie's back. She was waiting for me after the transplant surgery today. She said she needed my help and she wanted to talk to me." Meredith's green eyes were wide with intrigue as she urged him to continue. "She wants to have a baby, and that's not going to happen unless I agree to let her use the embryos."

Meredith was speechless for a few minutes as he sat there waiting for a reaction."Seriously!? After four years, she comes marching back here and asks you that?!?!" He nodded and took a sip of his coffee. "What the hell is she thinking? Did she explain why all of a sudden this is an issue for her? Alex, is she with someone else?"

"No. She said that she needs something to live for. She's working a secretarial job in Chehalis, hasn't spoken to her mom in a while, and is miserable. I just ... I don't know how to take it. She said she was stupid to leave me and if she could go back, she would. She looked sad Meredith. She's not the Izzie I remember. I mean, she's healthy and all again, but she just looks like she's given up. I don't want her to do that."

"So she thinks a baby will help?" Meredith rolled her eyes knowingly.

"I don't know. There are still things to talk about."

"Like?"

"She said I didn't owe her anything and that all she wanted from me was my signature. Mer, if she goes through with this, I'm still that kid's father. I can't just sign my name and never have contact with the kid. I promised myself years ago that I would never be like my dad. I'd never ignore my kids or treat them like crap. I'd be just like him if I stayed away."

"You're actually considering this." It was a statement more than a question.

"I can't let her give up. I can't change what happened between us any more than she can. But I also don't want her to fade away like my mother did after my father left. It was pathetic to watch and I couldn't bear it if that happens to Izzie and I could have prevented it."

"Oh my God. You still love her don't you? Even after the hell she put you through?"

He didn't answer her immediately, choosing instead to finish the remaining sip of his coffee. He knew he was stalling, but he couldn't give Meredith a straight answer.

He was saved when Derek appeared in the archway between the kitchen and living room. "Hey guys." He moved over to kiss his wife and sat on the stool next to her. "How you doing, Karev?"

The sympathetic look on the older man's face told Alex that he knew something. He rolled his eyes a moved to leave. "Don't leave, Alex. I figured you'd be here when I saw Stevens walking out of the hospital. Everything okay?"

Alex looked at Meredith and then back a Derek. "Not really, man."

The three doctors continued to talk for hours, weighing the pros and cons of the situation. By midnight they were all exhausted, both physically and emotionally, and Meredith insisted that Alex stay in the guest room that night. "That way, you can grovel to a certain three-year-old in the morning," Meredith said with a wink as she tossed an extra blanket at him and disappeared down the hallway.

He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep immediately, the enormity of what his ex-wife had asked hanging over him like a Seattle storm cloud in April. Staring up at the ceiling, his mind drifted back to the question Meredith had asked him. "You still love her, don't you?"

He knew he didn't love her the way he did the day he married her. Too much had happened for that to be the case. But there was still an undeniable tug in his heart whenever he thought of her. He thought he had moved on, thought he was better. But the look in her eyes when she spoke to him made him hurt for her. Despite everything she did to him, he couldn't wish pain on her. And he was telling the truth. He didn't want Izzie to wind up like his mother, fading into the background like she had no one. Neither of them deserved it.

And when he got right down to it, Alex knew he was Izzie's only chance to ever have a child. He couldn't just take that away from her. Regardless of how she treated him, he knew that any child of Izzie Stevens' would be a loved child. She didn't have it in her to not love a child, especially her own.

Finally, his eyes began to close and his last thoughts of his father and how he promised to never be like him vanished into a restless sleep.

* * *

Soft giggles rang in his ears as he felt a tap on his shoulder. "Unca Awex? You sweeping?"

An eye popped open and Alex turned his head toward the little girl who looked so much like her father. Dark curly hair and bright blue eyes appeared at the side of the bed. He opened his other eye and smiled at Georgia. "Yep, I'm still sound alseep, Peaches."

She giggled at her nickname and climbed up on the bed and put her hands on her hips, just like her mother would. "No you're not! Your eyes are opened!" He sat up and rubbed a hand down his face just before the little girl pounced, throwing her arms around his neck. While this wasn't unusual for them, it brought the thoughts of Izzie's request back to his mind. What would it be like to have a child of his own? Would he be as happy as a father as Derek apparently was? Would he be any good at it? The typical fears of any prospective father.

"Come on Unca Awex. Mommy's making breakfast!"

He got out of the bed she hopped on his back for her traditional piggy back ride to the kitchen. "So what you're saying is that it's cereal day, right?"

"Yeps!" They both laughed at this and Alex tickled his niece's feet, bringing out more laughter.

"What are you two laughing at?" Meredith asked as the pair walked into the kitchen.

"Nothing at all, Mer. Nothing at all." He placed Georgia in her booster seat at the table, and moved to the cupboard retrieving bowls and cereal very quietly so as not to tip off the woman hovering over the stove. He poured a bowl of marshmallow cereal with absolutely no nutritional value whatsoever for each of them.

Derek entered the kitchen at that moment, looked at Alex and Georgia at the table, then over at his wife and grabbed the box of muesli from the cupboard. He was seated on the other side of his daughter, who was staring at him adoringly. This didn't go unnoticed by Alex. By the time Meredith turned around from the stove, they were all happily munching on their cereal.

She glared at the two men with a look of disdain. "I hate you both." They both looked a little ashamed, but continued to eat their cereal with smirks on their faces. "Alex, you are a bad influence on my daughter. She never would have started eating that cereal if it weren't for you. Now she can't get enough." Her stare turned to her husband. "You know that I've been working on my cooking. It's not THAT bad anymore." In order to prove her point, she took a bite of the omelet she had slaved over. And immediately spit it in the sink.

"Screw it," she muttered where only Derek and Alex could hear her. Both men suppressed laughter as she slumped in the chair next to Alex and grabbed the box filled with marshmallows.

A few minutes later, Georgia had finished her cereal, hugged both of her parents and had left to go play in her play room, leaving the adults to talk.

"So have you figured out what you're going to do?" Derek asked the younger man.

"Not entirely." He sighed, still unsure of anything.

"I think you should consider it." Both men looked at Meredith when she speaks up. She looks at Alex with a soft smile playing at her lips. "I know I was dead-set against it last night. But I laid awake all night thinking about it. I'm not saying this for Izzie's sake, but for your's, Alex. I've seen you with Georgia. And I've seen you with your patients. You're not the kind of guy who should be relegated to being Uncle Alex for all of your friend's kids."

"But he could still meet someone, Meredith. He's still young and could meet someone tomorrow that he wants to share that with." Derek asserted as he placed his bowl in the sink. "Do you think it's okay for him to help his ex-wife who treated him like shit, when the perfect woman for him could be right around the corner."

"Guys, I've thought about all of this. Believe me, I've gone over all of it in my head a million times since yesterday. I still haven't made a decision. Izzie and I still have a lot to talk about. I'll just ... You'll know when we make our choice."

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_**Don't forget to review!**_ Next chapter: what choice with Alex and Izzie make?


	3. Chapter 3

**AGAIN**

**Chapter 3  
**

_I am really excited that you are all really enjoying this. I'm loving all of the reviews. I hope you continue to enjoy this story and **if you keep reviewing, I'll keep writing**!_

* * *

He was sitting on a bench in front of the hospital when she walked up. He was staring straight ahead, and she could almost see the wheels turning in his brain. A wave of guilt crept over her as she moved slowly closer. She had spent the whole night at her hotel tossing and turning, worrying about what today would bring. She could only imagine what he'd gone through/

Truth be told, she wouldn't have been the least bit shocked if he hadn't shown up or if he gave her a flat out "no" for his answer. She couldn't blame him. She knew how horribly she had treated him back when they were married. She wished desperately that she could change every minute of that time. Maybe by now they'd already have a few kids and she would be perfectly happy staying at home with them while Alex worked at the hospital. But she forced those thoughts from her mind as she approached him.

She sat next to him, but his eyes never moved and he didn't say a word.

"I'm sorry I did that to you yesterday. I shouldn't have. You have your own life now, and I had no right to show up and pressure you like that. You are a good man, Alex, but I thought about it and I'm pretty sure that it would take a saint to do what I asked you to do." She knew she was rambling and not making much sense, but it was better than the silence. "So I know what your answer is going to be and I just want you to know that it's okay. I don't blame you for telling me no. I just --"

"Are you sure you're in a place for this, Izzie?" he interrupted her rant with a quiet, but tense voice. "It's a baby not a puppy. I know what it's like to grow up with a parent who is there, but not really. You told me just yesterday that your life is a mess. Can you really bring a baby into that?"

She ran her fingers through her hair, and thought about her next words carefully. "I realize how pathetic I sounded yesterday, Alex. I need you to know that I'm not the same person I was when we first met. I'm different. Cancer, losing you, losing my job, leaving this city, all of those things made me different. I'm not the girl who cuts LVAD wires to move people up the transplant list. I'm not the girl who thinks that breaking up a married couple for selfish reasons is okay. I'm not the girl who leaves her husband on a piece of notebook paper. I've grown up. But even grown ups get lonely. I've got love to give but no one to give it to."

He was silent for what seemed like hours to her, then inhaled deeply. "Move back to Seattle."

"What?" The change in his voice surprised her.

He finallly turned and looked at her. "Move back to Seattle. I'm not going to be the man who's kid doesn't know him. I'm not going to be the dad who makes his kid feel worthless because he's never around. If you want to do this, you move back to Seattle and we do this together." She opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off. "I'm not saying that anything changes between us. I'm saying that we both made the decision years ago that you would be able to have a baby one day. It's not fair for me to keep that from you. But it wouldn't be fair for you to keep my kid from me. You're not the only one who needs something. So ... we do this together."

His voice wasn't loud, it wasn't angry. It was calm. Yet that scared her a little that he would think that about her.

"You know I won't keep you from your child, Alex. I would never do that," she whispered. "But as far as moving back ... I've saved every penny I could for a long time to be able to do this. To pay for the procedure and afford for me and the baby to live comfortably. I don't have extra for a move. Not to mention I don't have a job here."

"We'll figure something out," he said with a determined look on his face. "There's bound to be a job somewhere, and a place to live, and I'll help you. With all of it."

Her eyes were glued to his. "What are you saying, Alex?"

"I'm saying ... that if this is really what you want, then we should do it."

They sat each lost in their own thoughts for what seemed like an eternity. "Have you told anyone about this?" she asked suddenly. She wasn't exactly sure where she stood with her former friends, but she was fairly certain that none of them would be thrilled to see her or to learn of the choice that she and Alex had just made.

"Mer and Derek."

Izzie cringed at the thought of her last conversation with Meredith. "I'm sure that went well. Don't tell me they talked you into it."

"No, they took turns playing Devil's advocate," he said with a smirk on his face.

"Nice."

"Sorry. I didn't make my decision last night, though. It was this morning. Georgia woke me warning me that Meredith was cooking --"

She shot him a confused look. "Wait, who is Georgia?"

"Their three-year-old. They named her after O'Malley. I'm her godfather. I've got pictures." He grinned as he reached for his wallet and flipped to a picture of the tot.

It hit her hard to find out that Meredith Grey had a daughter that she knew nothing about. She realized exactly how much she had missed out on over the years as she took in the photo. "God, she looks just like Derek."

"But she has her mother's attitude and disposition. It's a bad combination. Or it will be ten years from now." He closed the wallet and returned it to his pocket. "Anyway, I saw the way she looked at Derek. Like he was the only person in the world. It struck me that I want that. I never looked at my dad the way that she looks at him. Like I said, you're not the only one who needs something right now."

"How come you never met anyone else, Alex?" She couldn't help but ask, and felt that she had a right to know if they were going to have a baby together. He hadn't come right out and said he was still single, but she knew.

He sighed, not entirely sure how to answer the question. "Not sure. I mean I haven't been celibate, if that's what you're asking." She rolled her eyes, thinking that some things never change. "But work has really been the only thing fulfilling to me. I'm good at my job. It's the one thing that I've been successful at in my entire life, and the rest of the stuff just makes me feel like a failure."

"You're not a failure, Alex. You are a good man. A great man. A great surgeon. It was me that was the failure. I failed at my job. I failed as a daughter. I failed as a wife. I'll be a good mother, though."

"You'll be a great mother." He corrected as he placed his hand over her's, reassuring her that he really was in this on his own volition. He smiled at her and she returned the favor.

"Alex, thank you. This ... it means a lot to me. We are going to raise this child as friends, right? I don't want this to be a constant struggle. And I don't want him or her to be caught in the middle of our stupid fights."

"Yeah. We can be friends, Iz." Her heart fluttered at his use of her nickname that always sounded more special coming from him. "I want us to move past everything that happened. We both want this. And I think we both need this." The tear rolling down her face suprised her, but not nearly as much as his arms wrapping around her in a comforting hug. She still marveled at his ability to know exactly what she needed. She lay her head on his shoulder and felt something she hadn't felt in over four years. Peace.

* * *

_**Review, Review, Review!!!**_


	4. Chapter 4

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 4**_

_I've been blown away with the comments you all have left in the reviews, and it really makes me feel good that you are all enjoying this story. This chapter is a little bit filler-ish. But I hope you enjoy it anyway. As always, more reviews make me want to write more! **So review away!**_

* * *

"You're what?!?!"

Alex was pretty sure Cristina's voice could be heard from Canada, but he was expecting it.

"Are you out of your mind, Alex? She left you. She up and left you on a stupid piece of paper and now you're going to have a baby with her? We should page Shepard. You clearly fell and hit your head on something. That's the only logical conclusion. I didn't think that even you were that stupid."

He sighed, choosing to focus on scrubbing in rather than arguing with his friend. But she refused to back off.

"Is she blackmailing you or something? Did she marry some rich guy who is willing to pay you off so that she can have a baby that he can raise? Ooh, is there some kind of inhertiance at stake. Very 'Days of Our Lives.'"

Finally he'd had enough. He stopped scrubbing and faced the small woman to his right. "Look, it's nothing like that. She's ready to be a mother. I'm her only option. She can't use the embryos unless I okay it. I can't take that away from her. She's moving back to Seattle and we're going to raise the baby together. I've thought about it a lot, and I want this, too."

Cristina's face softened a bit, sensing his sincerity. "I just don't want you getting hurt again." She rolled her eyes and looked away, smirk on her face. "You were pathetic enough the last time."

It was odd, really, the connection that Alex and Cristina had found after Izzie left for good. With both Izzie and George gone, the remaining three had bonded more than they ever would have thought possible at the beginning of their internship. Meredith was the glue that held them together, but the other two each had something that the other needed. They never stopped acting like the other annoyed them, but they knew they had each other's backs too.

"I'll be fine."

"Yeah, okay. Just don't expect me to help with diapers and spit up. It's bad enough dealing with the mini-McDreamette, I can't begin to imagine how much of a pain your kid's going to be, what with both yours and Izzie's DNA running through it," Cristina scoffed as Dr. Robbins and Dr. Aultman entered the room. They all finished scrubbing in and got to work on the infant with a heart defect.

They were midway through the procedure when Cristina spoke up rather unexpectedly. "Dr. Robbins, could you give me some statistics on multiple births in IVF procedures?" Alex's eyes nearly popped out of his head, and he could tell, even from behind her mask that his friend was wearing an evil grin on her face.

The pediatric surgeon looked at Dr. Yang with surprise at the sudden and seemingly unprovoked question. "Well, uh, approximately 20-25% of all IVF procedures end in multiple births, and the rate of trips and quads has increased dramatically over the years. But, if you're wondering anymore than that, you should speak to your OB/GYN. I'm just a pedes surgeon."

"Oh, I'm not asking for me," Cristina was quick to correct. "Just curious for a friend." Alex caught her eyes across the table and he glared at her. The thought hadn't even crossed his mind, even though he was very well aware of the possibility of more than one baby. Now it just made him sick to his stomach.

"Damn it!" Dr. Aultman's voice suddenly shattered his thoughts. "I've got another bleeder. We need more O-neg. Yang, get some pressure on here. Karev, get the paddles ready."

The all did as the former soldier ordered, moving quickly, knowing that seconds mattered, especially with a child so young. "Clear!" Alex shouted as he tried to get the baby's heart started again. But nothing worked the child was too far gone.

"Time of death," Dr. Robbins made the call minutes later. "8:22."

* * *

"Hey, you okay? You got out of there in a hurry."

Alex looked through his locker for nothing in particular. "Yeah, I'm fine. We've all lost patients before. It won't be the last time." He could feel Cristina's presence behind him sitting on the bench.

"You know I was just messing with you in there, right? About the multiples and stuff."

"Yang, it's the same crap you've been pulling for years. It didn't bother me." He wasn't sure if she could tell that he wasn't exactly telling the truth.

"Maybe me asking about the babies didn't bother you, but losing the patient did." He turned around an looked at her, about to retort, but she wouldn't let him. "It wasn't enough for Dr. Robbins or Dr. Aultman to notice, but I could tell. Alex, you're not going to be able to let this affect your work. You've been pushing so hard for so long to lose focus now."

"Yeah, I know."

He slumped down next to her on the bench. They sat in the quiet for a few moments, until Cristina couldn't take it. "So, lunch?"

"Sounds good."

They walked out of the lounge together, the door swinging shut as they moved down the hallway. "It could be multiples, you know ..."

"Shut it, Yang."

* * *

"Hey guys." Alex and Cristina took their normal seats next to Meredith in the cafeteria as she greeted them. "How'd the heart repair go?"

"It didn't," Alex mumbled.

Meredith noticed the sour expressions on both of their faces."Oh. Sucks."

"Yep." Alex said as he attacked to pasta on his plate.

"Did you know about this thing?" Cristina asked her best friend.

"What thing?"

"His thing." She pointed at Alex. "His 'I'm-going-to-have-baby-with-my-ex-wife" thing."

Munching on her sandwich, Meredith nodded. "Yeah. I knew. So, when is Izzie supposed to be back in town?"

"She turned in her two weeks notice at her job when she got back to Chehalis yesterday. So she'll be back in a few weeks. Hey, if you guys hear about any jobs or reasonable apartments not too far from the hospital, let me know. I want to find her something before she moves. Otherwise, I guess I'll have to let her stay at my place. Which means I'll be sleeping in on call rooms until she finds a place."

"You know, the fact that you have no desire to live under the same roof with her might be an indication that something's wrong with what you are doing, Alex," Cristina pointed out to the man across the table from her.

"Cristina!"

"What, Mer? I'm just saying ..."

"Look, I just don't want to push things." Alex spoke up before any type of catfight could ensue. "She's my ex-wife and I don't want things to be awkward. I'm not questioning having this baby with her."

The women nodded, understanding that he needed them to be okay with this, to be okay with Izzie and to help him out.

"She can stay with us." Alex looked up at Meredith with surprise. "In the guest room. We've got plenty of room, so if it gets awkward, she can just keep to herself. You seem so sure of this Alex, and I'm happy for you. I want to do what I can to make this easier. I'll talk to Derek and see what he has to say, but I'm sure it will be fine."

Alex looked at her, appreciation shining in his eyes. "Thanks, Mer." His pager went off at that moment, and he quickly excused himself from the table.

Cristina turned to look at her best friend, incredulous look on her face. "What are you doing, Mer? Letting Izzie live with you. Are you crazy? You hung up on her last time you talked, you were that angry."

"I know. But he's moving forward, and I think we should too. They're friends now, and I want to be her friend too. I want the group back together. As much as we can be, anyway." Both women let their minds wonder momentarily to their fallen collegue, George O'Malley.

"Well, I think you're both delusional," Cristina said, as she finished the last of the salad on her plate. "What happens when years from now she takes off and takes his kid with her. What's that going to do to him?"

Meredith sighed, leaning back in her chair. "I hope she won't do that. When it all comes down to it, it's his choice. He wants this. So I'll do everything that I can to help him. Even if it means forgiving Izzie. You should think about doing the same."

"Maybe."

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**REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!!!**


	5. Chapter 5

**AGAIN**

**_Chapter 5_**

_Okay, just so you know, I had this chapter written a week or so ago, WAY before I watched the episode "Blink." The discussion that Meredith and Alex had in the episode freaked me out a little bit, as it was eerily similar to a conversation I had written for this chapter. So this is my disclaimer that I did not copy from the episode! Hope you enjoy this chapter. At the end, I'll leave a little tease about what's coming up in the next one. **But please review!**_

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Izzie felt a small tug at her heart as he drove her past the old air stream trailer that held so many memories, both good and bad, of her short marriage to Alex. But thoughts of the past were interrupted as the car wound around the trees to reveal an unbelievably gorgeous Victorian house. A dream house. He parked in the driveway and looked her as she stared at the home.

"Wow," was all she could muster.

"You get used to it. Honestly, if it had been up to Mer, it would have been half the size. Too much to clean, she says. I don't know what she's got to complain about, living in a freakin' palace."

She remained silent, merely nodding in response to his little rant.

"Iz? You okay?"

She looked over at him. "Uh, yeah. I guess I'm just a little nervous. Are you sure she said this was okay? We haven't talked in so long, and now she's letting me crash in her guest room. It's a little weird."

"Okay, first of all don't be nervous." Alex placed a hand on her shoulder. "She's still the same Meredith. She and Derek are both okay with you staying here, so you can stop worrying. Also, it's just until we find you a job, so it's not like you'll be here forever. Oh, and I probably should have warned you about this earlier, I promised them fresh baked goods, from time to time. Preferably when I'm around."

"So the truth comes out. You just said yes to this whole thing so that you can have cake and cookies." She shook her head with a giggle playing on her lips. "You really are four sometimes."

He raised his hands in mock surrender."You caught me. Seriously, though. You have nothing to worry about, Iz. Worst that could happen is they throw you out to the trailer."

"Thanks a lot," she said as she smacked him in the chest with the back of her hand. "Okay, lets get this over with." She breathed deeply and stepped out of Alex's car as he pulled her suitcase from the trunk.

"Hello, anybody here?" Alex called as he opened the door to Meredith and Derek's house for Izzie.

"Be down in a minute!" Meredith replied. Alex lead his ex-wife to the living room, placing her suitcase out of the way.

Clearly in awe, Izzie looked around at the huge room with the vaulted ceiling and wall to wall windows looking out over the city and the bay. "And I thought it was gorgeous from the outside. This is amazing."

He nodded his agreement, as the sound of small feet started down the stairs.

"Unca Awex!!!" The little girl from the picture in Alex's wallet rounded the corner at a run, moving full speed toward him.

He knelt down to her level meeting her with a gigantic hug. "Peaches!" The hugging turned into tickling, causing her to produce a laugh identical to her mothers. The game kept up until the child noticed Izzie.

"Who's that, Unca Awex?"

"Georgia, this is Miss Izzie. She's a friend of mine and your mommy's." With his statement, Izzie felt a wave of sadness. First because she was a complete stranger to Meredith's child. Even worse though, was hearing Alex introduce her as his friend. She knew that the girl didn't need to know all the details of her sordid past, and she hoped she'd never find out, but she hadn't been around Alex since the divorce. Last time he introduced her to anyone, she'd been his wife.

"Hello, Georgia."

The girl looked up at her for a moment trying to decide if she was supposed to be shy or not, but her outgoing spirit won out. "You're pretty, Miss Izzie."

"Oh, well thank you! So are you. Your Uncle Alex told me lots about you."

Georgia motioned for Izzie to lean down so she could whisper in her ear. "He's my favorite Unca. He calls me Peaches and we pway games and he gives me cereaw that mommy doesn't want me to have. But it's a secret." She put her finger to her mouth, letting Izzie know that she wasn't to reveal the "secret."

Izzie looked up at Alex with an eyebrow raised. "Still can't live without your marshmallows can you?" He didn't respond, just rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Hey, sorry, I was cleaning crayon off of the playroom wall." Meredith appeared at the bottom of the stairs. "Somebody got a little carried away with her creativity," she continued, pointedly staring down at her daughter.

"Sorry, Mommy."

Meredith looked back up. Her eyes met Izzie's and neither woman really knew what to do. "Izzie."

"You sure this is okay? I don't want to be a bother." The taller woman couldn't help but feel a little out of place.

Meredith walked over to the other woman, and hesitating only slightly, put a hand on her arm squeezing gently. "Yes, I'm glad you're back. Really. I mean, we have things to talk about, but we'll work through it. If Alex can move past what happened, the rest of us can too. Plus, my mouth is watering at the thought of your baking."

She laughed. "Point me toward the kitchen."

"Let's get you settled in first. The baked goods can wait until later."

"Miss Izzie's staying here? With us?!" the little girl bounced up and down, tugging at her ponytail.

"Is that okay with you?" Izzie looked down at the little girl, who nodded quickly with a big grin spread across her face. "Well, that's that."

After Alex put Izzie's things in the room she'd be staying in, he left for the hospital, promising to return after his shift for dinner. Meredith settled the excited three-year-old down with a Barbie movie, knowing she'd soon fall asleep for her mid-morning nap. Joining Izzie on the couch, the two women made an effort to get reacquainted.

"So, Derek told me he'd be on the look out for a job for you. I mean we've all been talking to anyone who might have something, but with him being Chief of Surgery, he's got a little more pull."

A frown appeared on Izzie's face. "Don't worry, Mer. I'll be looking, too. I won't be in your house long."

"No, no. Iz, that's not what I meant. It's good that you're here. Georgia seems really taken with you, and you haven't even made cookies yet." Meredith rolled her eyes a bit. "My child seems to have developed a sweet tooth, thanks to Alex. So she'll love you even more after you feed her. But I wasn't trying to hurry you along. You're welcome as long as you need to stay. Plus, I know the next few months won't be easy. When is the IVF scheduled?"

"Two weeks. My doctor in Chehalis sent my files up here to Dr. Campbell. I'll have to do one more scan just to make sure that a recurrence hasn't happened, but if all that checks out, then we're good to go."

The woman across from her just nodded.

"You think I'm making a mistake, don't you?"

Meredith sighed and curled her legs up under her. "It's not that. It's just ... when you left the last time, I was so mad at you, Izzie. We all were." She sighed, clearly trying to keep the anger from years before from boiling over. "You didn't have to see him everyday, Iz. He turned back into the arrogant asshole we first met in our internship. He was mean, he was rude, he wasn't the man we all knew he really could be. And all I could think of was that you did that to him."

Izzie looked down at her hands, knowing that she had this coming to her.

"He stayed that way for a long time. It wasn't until Georgia was born, nearly a year after you left, that we got some of him back. She was sick, Iz. My daughter was sick and it was Alex who fixed her. When she was in the clear, I began to notice a change in him. He threw himself into work. He was there all the time. But he was smiling again. I don't want that to go away."

"I didn't want to do that to him, Mer. When I left, I wasn't thinking straight. I made some assumptions and I made some stupid choices. I know that, and it kills me now, hearing that he changed like that." She looked up and into her friend's eyes, tears threatening to spill from her own. "But I know that I can't turn back any of it. As much as I might want to."

Meredith nodded. "He said you talked through all of that, and it's clear that he is willing to take another chance on you, Izzie. I want this to work. I do. But you have to know that it took a long time for him to get over losing you. He wouldn't be able to get over losing a child. Don't change your mind four years from now and run again, not with a child involved."

"I understand your concern, Mer. I know I have a lot to prove to you. But I want that chance."

"Okay," Meredith said simply with a smile on her face.

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**Reviews please!**

Coming up next:

_"Barbie over there waltzes in here after four years of nothing, and expects to be let back in. And what do you three do? Hold the freaking door wide open for her!"_


	6. Chapter 6

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 6**_

_First of all, thank you so much for all of the reviews. I'm really flattered and overwhelmed by the response to this story. It really motivates me to write more and more. That's why I've been able to get these chapters out so quickly. I'm a little stuck on the next chapter, but I'm working through the writer's block. Just know that it might be a little longer wait between this chapter and the next. I all ready have four entire chapters written for the end of the story, but I have to work out what happens in between, so thanks in advance for your patience! So enjoy this chapter and **keep reviewing so that I can stay motivated!**  
_

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"Honey, we're home!" Meredith laughed at her husband as he walked into the kitchen, followed by Alex and Cristina. "And we brought take-out."

Derek kissed Meredith with a smile and then put the food on the counter. "A man after my own heart!"

"More like a man who doesn't want to get food poisoning." Cristina mumbled as she pulled out a bar stool sat down.

"Daddy, I mades dessert!" Having gone unnoticed in the corner of the kitchen, Georgia turned around, covered in pink icing. She wore an apron that was five sizes too big, but identical to the one Izzie was wearing as she stood next to the girl.

"I see that." He kissed his daughter's forehead. "Did Miss Izzie help you?"

"Yeps! She did the grown up stuff with the oven."

"Excellent!" Derek said as he reached for one of the cupcakes. He daughter grabbed his hand and pulled it away from the food.

"Daddy, you can't eats it yet."

Izzie smiled at the exchange, then suddenly felt a presence behind her. She turned and caught Alex trying to sneak a cupcake. "No way, Alex!" she smacked his hand away. "You can't eats it yet, either." She smiled at her ex-husband.

He grinned back, looking a little ashamed of himself. But only a little. He glanced around, watching Derek and Meredith cleaning up the icing off of their daughter, and Cristina clearly caught up in a text message on her phone. He looked back at Izzie. "So, how did it go today," he whispered.

"It was fine." She turned back around to start picking up the cupcake pans and bowls of frosting. "We talked after you left and got all of the awkward stuff out of the way, and then we went to lunch, the grocery store and then we made cupcakes. It was kind of fun, actually. Makes me realize what all I missed."

"Good. I was worried ..."

"Don't be. It's great now." She glanced over her shoulder to the woman sitting at the island. "She hates me doesn't she?"

Alex followed her eyes to Cristina. "I ... have no idea. I mean she hasn't really said much to me one way or another. You know how she can be. I do know that she's not crazy about the thing with the baby, but that doesn't matter."

"I know. I just ... "

"Izzie, don't. Whatever it is, she'll get over it." The blonde in front of him nodded and smiled. "Now, let's clean this up so we can eat. I'm starving."

With everyone's help, dinner was served ten minutes later in the rarely used dining room. Derek had opened a bottle of red wine and was filling the glasses as everyone sat down at the table. "So, Izzie, I think I may have some good news for you," he said as he sat at the head of the table.

Izzie looked over at Alex next to her with a questioning stare. He clearly had no idea what Derek was about to say, so she turned back to look at the chief of surgery. "What kind of news?"

"I asked my assistant Mary if she knew of any jobs that might be around. Then she proceeded to burst into tears and handed me a piece of paper. Her resignation. Then she started mumbling something about 'Deliverance' and mosquitoes. Apparently her husband got transferred to Tennessee. So, I'm in need of someone with secretarial experience who happens to be looking for a job. Know anyone?"

"Oh, my God! Are you offering me a job?"

"She's not leaving for another month, but if you want to start next week, she can get you acquainted with the ins and outs of what you'll be doing. It's yours if you want it."

"Do I want it?! Are you kidding." She jumped out of her seat, ran around to Derek and threw her arms around his neck. "Thank you so much!"

"Hey, Iz, that's my husband you've got your arms around, you know that?" Meredith grinned as her friend released Derek and smiled back at her.

"Sorry," she giggled as she returned to her seat.

"So should we have a toast," Derek asked as he picked up his glass. "To old friends, new jobs, second chances ..."

"... Or third or fourth chances," Alex spoke up, as he, Izzie, Meredith and Derek laughed.

"... And to new family members who hopefully will be joining our group in the not too distant future." Derek raised his glass and the others followed suit, except for Cristina who had been silent the whole time. Her inexplicable stillness caused the others to look in her direction.

"Uh, Cristina, aren't you going to drink anything?" Meredith could tell something wasn't right with her best friend.

"When I'm ready to, I'll drink. For some bogus toast, no thank you."

"Cristina!"

"No, Meredith. Don't look so shocked. Barbie over there waltzes in here after four years of nothing, and expects to be let back in. And what do you three do? Hold the freaking door wide open for her. You let her live in your house." Her steely gaze moves to Derek. "You give her a cushy job that she did nothing to deserve." Her eyes hone in on Alex. "And you! After all the hell she put you through for years, you agree to let her have your baby."

"Miss Izzie's having a baby?!" Georgia squealed, but Cristina just ignored the child.

"You must be out of your mind, Alex. She's just going to do that to you all over again."

"Can it, Yang," Alex said through gritted teeth as anger flared in his eyes. Beside him, Izzie hung her head, not wanting to meet Cristina's fiery stare.

"No," she rose from her chair and turned her vitrol on Izzie. "I fought for you. I fought for you! And you return the favor by screwing us all over. You don't deserve to be let back in. If you did, you wouldn't have left in the first place." She moved from the table, grabbed her purse and slammed the front door as she exited.

The others sat in shocked and angry silence.

"Miss Izzie's having a baby?!" Georgia asked again, not used to being ignored and clearly unphased by her Aunt Cristina's outburst.

The adults all looked at each other, Meredith finally calm enough to answer. "Um, yeah sweetie. Hopefully."

"Now?"

"No, not for a while. It takes a long time to have one."

"Oh." The three year old pondered this for a moment. "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Her mother's eyes went wide as the other three welcomed the break in the tension Cristina had created. They knew that they would have to come back to what had just happened, but for the moment they chose to finish their meal in peace.

* * *

"Hey, you okay?"

Izzie looked up to find Alex standing just outside the door that lead to the deck where she was seated on a bench.

"Yeah. I'm fine." He perched on the railing of the deck, effectively blocking her view of the bay and forcing her to look at him. The look on his face told her that he didn't believe her. "Really, Alex. I'm fine. I had it coming."

"No, you didn't. She had no right to say those things to you. To any of us."

"Why is she so angry at me? If you can forgive me ... I just don't understand why she can't." She hated the tears that were beginning to well up in her eyes. "We'd gotten so much closer before ... with the cancer and everything. I don't get it."

Alex sighed, crossing his arms over his chest. "After you left the last time, she did the same thing I did. Basically tried to forget you even existed. I never could figure out why she did it. I was a little wrapped up in myself to worry too much about her, though. This, tonight, I have no idea where it came from. I mean she's been a little pissy since Hunt left, but nothing that would cause an outburst like this."

"Hunt left? They broke up?" She was surprised Meredith hadn't mentioned it.

"Not officially. He went to D.C. to train medics for front-line trauma cases. He's coming back after his year is finished, so they didn't break up." A smirk played at his lips. "I think she just misses the sex."

Izzie laughed a real laugh, knowing that it was likely the truth. "Yeah, she always did get irritable when she wasn't getting any. What's going on inside?"

"Mer and Derek were tucking Georgia into bed, trying to avoid answering the 'where do babies come from' question. Meredith told her to ask me, and I high-tailed it."

She smiled up at him, shaking her head. "You're really great with her, Alex." There was a tug on her heart as she thought about the interaction she had seen between him and Georgia. She suppressed the wave of emotion coming over her by standing up and moving next to him. "You're going to be a great dad."

"I hope so. Sometimes I wonder."

"Why?"

"I don't know what it takes to be a good dad. Never had one myself. You know that, Iz."

She nodded, thinking back to the discussions they'd had over the years concerning their childhoods and adolescences. Painful memories for both of them. She patted him on the shoulder. "Then you know exactly what not to do. Hell, my mom isn't exactly Carol Brady herself. We're both jumping without a net, Alex. We'll be fine. We'll figure it out. What I do know is that I can't think of a better man for my kid to call dad. You turned out okay."

He looked over at her and something stirred deep down inside her. The look in his eyes reminded her so much of the way he used to look at her. She knew she was imagining it, though. He didn't love her anymore, and she had no right to expect it. Not after what she did to him.

Looking away, he took a deep breath. "We both did."

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_**Review, Review, Review!!!**_


	7. Chapter 7

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 6**_

_Okay, so after the complete massacre that was last night's episode, I had to go back to my happy place, which is this fic. Seriously depressing and I really don't think Shonda's going to be able to fix it this time. I do think that Alex and Izzie are end game, even if it is a single scene in the final episode (or Chambers' last show whichever comes first) of someone running through an airport, almost missing the plane, and showing up to a lake somewhere with Don Henely playing in the background ... a'la Doug and Carol from ER. But since I don't in anyway trust Shonda anymore, I'm continuing this fic in order to bring some happiness to the now gloomy world of the Alex and Izzie fandom._

_So, with that rant over, I hope you enjoy this chapter. And I hope it brings a smile to your face. We could all use a little more of that, don't you think? **Please Review if you like this story. I need all the encouragement I can get now.**_

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He got to work early the next day, set on tracking down Cristina and giving her a piece of his mind. He found her in the residents' lounge, reading a medical journal at one of the tables. Walking over, he tossed his bag in the general direction of his locker. He slammed her reading material shut as he sat down in the chair next to hers.

She looked up at him, annoyance marring her usually unreadable face. "Karev! I was reading that."

"What the hell was that last night, Yang?"

"Just calling it like I saw it," she said as she leaned back in her chair nonchalantly.

"No, that's not what it was. You're pissed about something and you took it out on Izzie." He voice was a whisper, but the anger and tension was apparent. "I'm not leaving here until you tell me what your problem is."

"Look, Alex, I have my reasons for being upset at Izzie, but it's none of your business. You're not her boyfriend or her husband. Your the ex-husband, soon-to-be baby daddy. How I deal with Izzie being back is my business, so just leave it alone."

"No. Regardless of what happened, you were her friend years ago. I've moved past the hell she put me through. Why can't you? She wants to be your friend again and you're ignoring her. You're treating her like crap and I don't like it. So just get over yourself." He watched her expectantly for a response, but she didn't say a word. She simply picked her journal up and began reading again. He sighed, and stood up from his chair. "Fine. Be like that. But could you at the very least be civil to her here in the hospital? No more outbursts."

"Sure, whatever."

He shook his head at her sour expression and moved to get ready to begin his day.

* * *

"Hi!"

"Hey, Iz. What are you doing here?" Meredith motioned to the chair next to her and Izzie sat obediently.

"I just had my scan, so I figured I'd catch up with you for lunch while I waited for the results."

"Even after the dinner disaster last night?"

"I'm not going to let Cristina bother me. Avoiding her won't help, so I'll just kill her with kindness." A huge determined grin splashed across her face, and Meredith couldn't help but laugh.

"We'll you know Cristina. That may just actually kill her." Both women laughed knowingly. "I really have no idea what her problem was. I did however see Alex track her down in the lounge. He still looked pissed. Maybe he had more luck than I did. All I got was 'I don't want to talk about it.' You'd think that someone would tell their person what what bothering them."

Izzie laughed as Meredith popped a carrot in her mouth. Her eyes widened a bit as Cristina walked into the room from the door behind Meredith. "Oh, twelve o'clock," she whispered.

"I hate dealing with patient's parents." Cristina sat her tray at the chair farthest away from Izzie. "It's worse than dealing with their spouses. I mean the man is 32 years old. He sure as hell doesn't need mommy asking his doctor's questions for him."

"Hi Cristina." Izzie said with a confident smile.

She could see that Cristina desperately wanted to make a smart ass remark, but was surprised when she restrained herself. "Izzie."

An awkward silence ensued as Meredith looked from one woman to the other. "Okay can one of you say something. This thing right here, the silence thing, is freaking me out just a little bit," she said finally after five minutes.

Izzie smiled again. "Cristina, what's going on with your patient?" She knew talking shop was the only way to get to the doctor, so she went with it.

"Cardio myopathy." Cristina said with a roll of her eyes. "One of the worst cases I've seen. We would have operated yesterday, but mommy dearest wanted a second and third opinion. The woman has more questions than brain cells."

"Maybe she's just concerned about her son." Izzie suggested as she swiped a cucumber slice from Meredith's plate.

"See?" Meredith said with a smile. "That wasn't so hard. It's just like old times, right. Cristina acting like a robot, Izzie the ever-present optimist. Just like when we were interns." She was about to continue when her pager went off. "Damn it. It's day care. Last time they paged me, Georgia had bit some kid, because she said he deserved it. This should be fun. You two, try not to kill each other."

Once she had disappeared, the other two were left to stare at each other.

Sighing, Izzie looked down at her hands and began to speak. "Look, Cristina. I know that you hate me and I know you've got a lot going on right now. But I want to know what I can do to make you stop hating me. What I did was terrible. I know this. But Alex has forgiven me. So just tell me what to do to make you forgive me and I'll do it. If you won't do it for me, do it for him. He needs your support. You're friends, Cristina."

An incredulous laugh rang from Cristina's lips. "Izzie, you have no idea what's going on with me, and you have no idea what Alex really needs. If you did you wouldn't be here." With that she stood, picked up her tray and exited the cafeteria.

Izzie leaned back in her seat, running her fingers through her hair. "Well that could have gone better," she mumbled to herself. Looking at her watch she decided that her films might be ready, so she got up and headed over to oncology.

* * *

"Meredith!" Izzie bounded up to her friend, giant smile plastered on her face. "Got my scans back. All clear."

"Yeah, that's great, Iz." Meredith was clearly distracted, and Izzie furrowed her eyebrows and placed a hand on Meredith's shoulder.

"Mer, what's wrong?"

"Georgia's sick. She's got a fever and chicken pox have been going around the day care. They think she probably has it too." The smaller woman ran her fingers through her hair, clearly trying not to look panicked. "Okay. I'm going to have to take her home. I'll just hand off Mr. Allen's surgery to someone else. It's not like it's some once-in-a-lifetime surgery, except it totally is," she mumbled, talking more to herself than to Izzie. "Baby trumps surgery. Baby trumps surgery."

"Mer, I can take Georgia home and watch her the rest of the day. I'm done here, so I'm free."

Meredith's eyes widened at the suggestion. "You wouldn't mind?"

"Not at all. Why don't you go get her and then I'll take your car home, since it has the car seat in it. You can ride home with Derek. We'll stop by the store on the way home and get some sick-kid food and then we'll just hang out until you get home. It'll be fine. I need the practice anyway."

"Please, your not even a mom yet and your already a better one than I am." Meredith rolled her eyes, nodding. "Okay. I really appreciate this, Iz. I'll owe you one."

"I'll hold you to that," Izzie said with a giggle.

* * *

"Miss Izzie?" Georgia looked up at her as she crawled into her bed.

Pulling the blankets up over the little girl, and tucking them tight around her, she smiled. "Yeah?"

"How do you know my mommy?"

"We were doctors together a long time ago." Izzie fluffed the pillow behind the girl's head, knowing that she needed to be comfortable for as long as possible. The spots that were beginning to appear on her arms and chest would start itching soon enough and the poor kid was in for a long week.

"But you're not a doctor anymore are you? Daddy says you're going to be his 'sistant. Why aren't you a doctor wike everyone ewse?" Georgia's big blue eyes stared up at her, making it impossible to dodge the question.

"Well, sweetie, I was sick for a while and then I made some bad decisions in my life. So I had to stop being a doctor."

"What kind of sick?"

"I had cancer. But I beat it. It took me a long time to get better, and I took lots of medicine and eventually got well."

"I was sick when I was a baby. At weast that's what mommy says. My tummy was messed up, but Unca Awex fixed me. Now I's fine. Cept for the pox."

Izzie giggled at the child. "Chicken pox. Now, you need to rest, okay? I'll be downstairs, but the monitor is on, and I'll take the other half with me. Just call for me if you need me, okay?"

Georgia nodded and closed her eyes, as Izzie brushed the hair from her face. As she looked down at the child, she couldn't help but wonder what it would be like when her baby got the chicken pox. Would she be able to handle it? Could she stay this calm if her kid ever broke an arm or sprained an ankle. What if her cancer came back. What if she had to say goodbye? Tears formed in her eyes at the thought, so she quietly slipped out of the room before she let out a whimper.

Through her moment of doubt, she felt her phone vibrate in the pocket of her sweater. She pulled it out, figuring that it was Mer calling into check on Georgia. Instead, the display read "Alex".

"Hello?"

"Hey, I heard you had to take Georgia home from day care. Everything okay?"

"Yep, nothing that some rest and an oatmeal bath won't fix."

"Yeah, I thought that was going around. She's a little trooper, though, I can tell you that. She'll be up and around in no time. Kids are resiliant like that. Georgia especially."

"I couldn't help but think what it will be like when its our baby. Do you think ... I mean ... we'll be able to handle it, right?"

"Iz, you're freaking out a little bit. Yeah, our kid'll get the chicken pox. Stuff happens, but we'll do everything we can to keep the kid safe and healthy."

"I just ... it hit me that my cancer could come back, Alex. What if I'm the one that gets sick. Then what?" She hated the tears that began to fall as she settled down on the plush sofa in the living room.

Alex sighed, and she could hear his voice wavering slightly. "Then you fight again. You fight for you yourself and you fight for our kid. You did it before, you can do it again." He hesitated for a moment. "Where is this coming from Iz? The scans came back clean, didn't they?"

"Yeah. Everything was fine. I'm sorry I didn't mean to get you worried. I was just watching her rest and feeling so bad, it reminded me of everything that I went through when I was sick. Which got me thinking about what could happen ... Alex, you would take care of our baby if anything happened to me, right?"

"Iz, I wasn't joking when I told you that we would do this together. I meant that. Nothing's going to happen to you. But if it did, you know I wouldn't just abandon our kid. I'll be an attending before the kid gets here and my schedule will get better. But you're fine so it's a moot point. You're not changing you mind are you?" She smiled a little bit at the fear she heard in his voice. It did a lot to reassure her that he really did want this.

"No. No I'm definitely not. I don't know where any of this is coming from. I'm just hormonal I guess. The stupid shots, you know. "

"Here's what you do. Go to the kitchen. Raid Mer's refrigerator, and bake something. Anything. It doesn't matter what. Just be sure you save some for me!"

She giggled. "Enough with the sweets already. You ate three cupcakes last night. Seriously how do you not weigh 500 pounds?"

"Haven't had to worry about it with you not here. Now I'm not so sure," he said, both of them relieved to be talking about something other than chicken pox or cancer. "I may have to spend extra time at the gym from now on. So I've got to go, but I just wanted to check in."

"Okay ... Oh! Alex, I forgot. I scheduled a consultation with Dr. Campbell next week, you know, if you want to come. It's just going to be drawing blood and preliminary crap but ..."

"I'll be there, Iz. Got to go, but I'll call you later."

"Bye." She closed the phone, smiling again.


	8. Chapter 8

**AGAIN**

**_Chapter 8_**

_This is a shorter chapter, but I really felt that it needed to stand alone. It didn't turn out exactly like I wanted it to but I hope you all like it anyway. This chapter skips ahead a few weeks in the story. I've already got about four future chapters written entirely (but not in order) So things are coming along nicely. I really appreciate all of you who are faithfully reading this story. **Please let me know that you are still reading because reviews are what keep me wanting to write!** Enjoy..._

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"Did I miss anything?" Alex worked to keep his voice even as he entered the waiting room in Dr. Campbell's office. Izzie's brown eyes popped over the top of the celebrity tabloid she was reading. "Sorry, Iz. I got stuck in surgery. Kid decided it would be the perfect time to jump on the bed and rip out the sutures holding his chest together. We had to rush him back into the OR."

Izzie put down the magazine and rolled her eyes. "Don't blame the kid. Besides, all you've missed is the nurse asking me a bunch of questions she already had the answers to if she had bothered to look in my file. So you didn't miss anything."

"Okay. Good," he says as he sits down beside her. "So, we're really doing this, huh?"

"Alex, please tell me you haven't changed your mind." Panic began to show in her eyes. He placed one hand on her shoulder and covered her mouth with the other. He knew she would freak out and he wouldn't be able to get a word in edge wise, if he didn't stop her now.

"No. I haven't changed my mind. I was simply making conversation. I want this. You know that. We've had 45 discussions about it in the last month. When you first showed up. When you came back, the first appointment with Dr. Campbell and all the times in between. We're going to go into that office and get you pregnant. Not nearly as entertaining for me as it once could have been, but whatever," he added with a smirk.

She grabbed his wrist, pulling his hand from her face revealing a smile. "Okay." Their eyes met and for the briefest of moments he felt his heart twisting in his chest.

"Isobel Stevens." The nurse's voice pulled them out of their momentary bubble.

Izzie stood up and followed the woman. "Alex. You coming?"

"Uh. Yeah. I'm right behind you." They were shown into the procedure room. The room was a pastel green with floral murals painted on both the walls and the ceiling, and Alex found it a bit too feminine to his liking. Not that it mattered, but thinking about the decor of the room kept him from overthinking the connection he'd just felt with his ex-wife.

"I'm Valerie and I'll be here if you need anything. Your gown and a sheet is on the table. We'll give you a few minutes to change and then Dr. Campbell will be in here and we'll get started. Okay?" Izzie nodded and the nurse smiled and excused herself, shutting the door behind her.

Izzie put her purse in one of the chairs and picked up the gown. Alex cleared his throat as she reached for the top button of her blouse. "Uh, I can step out, Iz."

"Oh come on, Alex, we were married. You've seen me naked a thousand times. Not to mention you're a doctor."

"I've seen you naked as my girlfriend. And as my wife. We're friends. Friends don't get naked in front of each other."

"Then just turn around. I'm going to change, but you don't have to watch." He turned around pretending to be reading the posters on the wall. Mentally he was convincing himself that he was giving her privacy, but if he were honest with himself, he couldn't look at her. He knew that if he did he wouldn't be able to keep the wall he had built around himself strong. It would collapse in no time if he saw her soft skin and her toned stomach and ...

"You're not going to get all modest and crap in the delivery room are you? Because, really, I'm not going to care all that much about modesty then. I think it's really sweet and all, but we are adults, Alex. Adults who are having a baby together." She sighed. "Okay, I'm covered. You can turn around now."

She was seated on the examination table when he turned around. "So ... " Alex knew he looked as uncomfortable as he felt. The environment was unnatural to him and he couldn't quite figure out what to do with his hands. He finally settled for shoving them in the pockets of his scrubs.

"Alex, will you relax? You know this procedure. It shouldn't be making you act like this."

"Yeah, well this time the procedure will end with me becoming a father, so excuse me if I'm a little nervous," he snapped.

Izzie stared at him, and he had a feeling that she was about to let loose on another tirade. And he knew it would be justified. He shouldn't have said that. But he was shocked when instead of yelling at him, she bit her bottom lip as if she were trying not to laugh. It was clearly a battle she was losing when Alex saw her whole body begin to shake. Finally an uncontainable guffaw spilled out.

"What's so funny?"

"I'm sorry. But I just ... You're going to be a father. And I'm going to be a mother." He raised his eyebrows, still not really seeing the humor in her statement. "I was just thinking back to when I first met you. How much of an asshole I thought you were. And then our terrible timing and awful luck. And yet here we are in a doctor's office about to become parents. I know there's nothing really funny about it. But did you ever really think we'd get to this point?"

Her laughter was contagious, because he was soon laughing right along with her. "Okay. It is a little funny." He sat down in the chair next to the table and placed a hand on her knee, and they both dissolved into laughter again. "Do you remember when I found that photo of you from the magazine?"

"Yeah, and you plastered it up all over the hospital," she giggled. "I still hate you for that, by the way."

"No you don't."

"Okay, fine. I don't."

Their eyes met for the second time that afternoon and it was comforting to Alex to know that they could still do this. Banter like they used to do during their internship. Again he felt that twist in his chest, that slightest flicker of hope that for once something in his life could go right.

A knock on the door sounded a second before Dr. Campbell stuck her head in the door. "You ready, Izzie?" When she confirmed that she was, the middle-age woman with short dark curly hair entered the room, followed by Valerie and a lab tech. Alex moved to the other side of the table where he would be out of the way. After conversing with her staff for a few moments, she turned back to them.

"So how are you both? Ready for this?"

Izzie looked up at Alex, and he smiled back at her. "Yes. Definitley ready."

"Good." She set up the stirrups, and Izzie scooted back on the table. A few minutes later, the procedure was over.

"Now you'll need to rest here for an hour, and then you need to do nothing but rest for the next 36 hours. And of course, you know that you're encouraged to avoid sexual activity for the first 16 weeks with this kind of procedure."

Izzie snorted and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, that's not a problem, trust me."

Dr. Campbell looked from her patient to the man standing beside her. "Okay, just a reminder," she smiled at them. "I'll be back in a little while to check on you, all right?"

The doctor left the room and Alex looked down at Izzie. "So, that's that. Now what?"

"Now I want ice cream. Chocolate."

"Cravings start this fast?"

She grinned up at him. "No I just want some. If I'm going to be stuck in a bed for the next 36 hours and I'm going to be getting fat anyway, I want chocolate ice cream."

"Fine. We'll stop at the store on the way to Meredith's and I'll run in and get you some. I'm going to go change but I'll be back in a few, okay?" He couldn't help himself, he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head. He sent her a smirk and left the room.

Izzie closed her eyes and took in the sensation that Alex's lips had left against her forehead. She knew she should try to ignore it, that it meant nothing. But she couldn't entirely push the thoughts from her mind. Rubbing her hand against her abdomen, sending up a silent prayer for the IVF to work. It had to work.

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_**REVIEWS ARE FABULOUS!!!**_


	9. Chapter 9

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 9**_

_So, is Izzie pregnant? Did the IVF work? You'll find out in this chapter! And at the end of the chapter, will be a tease for the next chapter, as my gift to you. Just a word of thanks to all of you who are so faithfully reading this story. You are fantastic and I appreciate your kind words. I really get a thrill out of logging on and seeing everyone's reaction. **Please keep the reviews coming and I'll keep the chapters coming. Thanks!**_

* * *

"Izzie?!"

"In the kitchen, Alex!" He immediately smelled the evidence of the fact when he moved further into the house. Pancakes, blueberry if he wasn't mistaken, and scrambled eggs and bacon. His favorite breakfast. He couldn't help but wonder if she'd remembered that after all of these years, or if it was coincidence.

He entered into the large kitchen, smile plastered on his face, question on the tip of his tongue. "You ready to go?" He tried to keep the excitement and nervousness out of his voice, but he knew as soon as he said it that he had failed miserable.

She turned to look at him and he couldn't help but remember how much he used to love to watch her cook in the mornings. No makeup, hair knotted up at the nape of her neck, dressed in ratty sweat pants and a t shirt that usually had belonged to him. That was what got him up in the mornings. He realized that he missed it. "Alex, we're not scheduled to be there for another three hours."

"Right." He leaned against the island not really knowing what to do with himself. He knew he could have slept another hour or so but with Izzie's blood test scheduled for that day, he couldn't have gone back to sleep if he tried. They had decide to forgo the home tests, just in the interest of accuracy, but the wait was really starting to nag at him. By lunchtime he'd know if he was going to be a father.

"Can you get the plates?"

"Oh yeah, sure." He grabbed two plates from the cabinet and set them on the counter next to the stove. He looked at her and was surprised to see her so calm.

"We've got plenty of time. You can relax, Alex." She smiled up at him as she piled his plate with food.

"I'm fine."

"You're nervous. You are jingling your keys and shuffling your feet. You're acting the same way you acted every time I went in for a surgery when I was sick, which was also the same way you acted when we got married. I've seen nervous Alex, and this, right here, is a very nervous Alex. Calm down and eat."

He looked around the kitchen and noticed for the first time exactly how much food had been cooked. Three plates filled with bacon, a huge bowl of eggs and seven stacks of pancakes covered the counter top. "Iz, you cooked enough food to feed the entire hospital. I'm not the only one nervous."

She glanced at the surrounding area, and her face got red. Sheepishly, she pushed a piece of hair from her face. "Fine. You're right. I'm kind of freaking out. I haven't felt any symptoms. With Hannah I was sick from the very beginning. I haven't once needed to throw up and I haven't been dizzy. I even went to the store yesterday and bought some grapes hoping I'd feel the overwhelming need to eat the entire bag, but I don't want them. Last time I wanted grapes constantly. Stupid little fruit is doing nothing for me right now." Tears welled up in her eyes as her chin began to quiver. "I don't think it worked, Alex."

He reached over, and turned off the stove, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Iz,every pregnancy is different. You know that. But it worked. I'm sure of it. And if it didn't ... well, we'll just try again. We've still got some viable embryos left. But, it won't matter because it did work. So, let's sit down and eat something and then you finish getting ready and we'll go to the hospital and get the blood test. Okay?"

She nodded and forced a smile onto her face. "When did you turn into Mr. Positivity?" she asked with a giggle as they moved the food to the table. He smiled at her a simply shrugged. They sat and enjoyed the meal making small talk and trying to keep themselves distracted from the nerves they both felt.

* * *

The jingle of Alex's keys echoed around Dr. Campbell's office as they sat side by side on a couch in front of the doctor's desk waiting for the blood test results.

"Alex, stop it." Her words were harsher than she intended, but she her nerves were shot.

"What?"

"The keys. Stop jingling them. I get it. I get that you're nervous but you've been jingling them all morning. It's driving me insane." He stilled his hands and the room was enveloped in silence. She sighed, almost wishing she hadn't stopped him. The quietness was nearly painful to her. It took her back to those moments when the problem was cancer and they were waiting to find out how close to death she happened to be at that moment. He held her hand back then, and now he kept his distance. This wasn't life or death, she knew, but couldn't help but feel that if the test did come back negative that she would be losing a little piece of hope she was holding onto.

Finally the door opened and the OB stepped in. "Well, I got your results." Her expression wasn't giving anything away. "Would you like to read them?"

Izzie looked at the man beside her. "You do it, Alex. Please."

He nodded and took the piece of paper from Dr. Campbell. He scanned it quickly. For a moment, his face was stoic and Izzie felt her heart sink a little further in her chest. Then a smile, a genuine smile, crossed his face. He looked over at his ex-wife and she saw the excitement in his eyes. "It's positive. It worked, Iz. You're pregnant!"

"Oh my God! We're having a baby!" She felt his arms move around her as he pulled her closer. "Thank you Alex. Thank you so much." She held him tight as tears formed in her eyes. She leaned back and put her hand on her stomach looking down at the place where her baby was growing. She looked back up at Alex and saw him watching her hand, emotion clear on his face. She grabbed his hand and placed it where hers had been only seconds before.

He looked up into her eyes, unable to say anything, but Izzie could tell how moved he was. She could read those hazel eyes better than anyone, even after years apart. She felt his hand move from her stomach, but he never relinquished his hand's grip on hers.

Dr. Campbell's voice brought them out of their reverie. "Congratulations you two." They both returned their gazes to the older woman, spending the next half hour going over everything they needed to know.

* * *

"Alex, Izzie!" Meredith's voice assaulted them the moment they walked into the cafeteria. They looked in her direction and found her sitting with Derek, Arizona, Cristina, Teddy and Bailey.

"Hey guys. What's going on?" Alex asked as they moved over to stand next to the table.

"What do you mean, what's going on? Are you pregnant or not?" Arizona, with her ever-present perkiness, asked the question that had them all curious.

Alex and Izzie looked at each other and smiled. "Yep. I'm pregnant." The table erupted with cheers and congratulations. Meredith was on her feet in seconds and embraced Alex and then Izzie. Derek shook Alex's hand and Izzie hugged everyone. As questions and the hugging continued, Cristina got up and left the table without a word. Teddy and Bailey both saw this and turned to look at Izzie, who very obviously notice the departure. She met both of their eyes and shrugged, forcing herself to not let Cristina ruin her day.

"So how are you feeling?"

"What?" Izzie turned back to all the chatter and looked toward Derek.

"I asked how you were feeling?" he repeated to his assistant as she sat down in a chair next to Meredith. "Do you need some time away from the office?"

"No! No I feel great. Dr. Campbell said I can keep my regular schedule. I just need to take it easy like any woman would. So just don't ask me to run any marathons and we're good," she answered with a smile.

"See, Izzie, you weren't around when I was pregnant," Meredith said. "Derek and Alex were the most over-protective husband and friend a girl could have. So now you get to experience the joy of being watched every second of every day. "

Alex scoffed. "We weren't that bad."

"I walked out of the ladies room one time and the two of you were flanking the doorway like body guards. If you'd had on suits and ties you would have been mistaken for secret service."

"We just wanted to make sure you were okay," Derek defended.

"I had to pee!"

The women laughed and the two men looked a little embarrassed. Izzie put a hand on Alex's shoulder. "It's okay. I think it's sweet that you two looked after Meredith like that. However, the first time I catch you going all secret service on me, I will hurt you." She added with a grin. Nothing could spoil the joy she felt. She was having a baby who had a great dad. She was back in Seattle. She had a great job and great friends. Sitting there she knew that their choice had been the right one.

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_**Next Chapter: **"Then there was a bomb in a chest cavity, I'm having a baby and my husband is having Shepard drilling inside his brain, and what are those to doing? Getting nasty in the supply closet."_

_**REVIEWS APPRECIATED!!!**_


	10. Chapter 10

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 10**_

_So we made it to double digits. Yay! Okay, so this chapter is a little different. But it's important for the story to progress. Just as a warning, there will be some drama in the next few chapters. In fact, I'll tease some of the drama at the end of this chapter. Thanks for all the fantastic reviews! They really make my day.** The reviews make me want to write more so you know what to do ....**_

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"How's it looking Dr. Bailey?" Dr. Aultman and Cristina entered the OR scrubbed and ready to get started on their part of the operation on a young woman in her early twenties who has just been brought in after a head-on car collision.

Bailey looked down at the woman with a sad look on her face. "Spleen's got to come out, but the colon is lacerated and leaking into the abdomen, so I've got to fix that first. A lot of damage. If she makes it, she's going to have a long recovery ahead of her. Do you think you can fix the heart tear?"

"We'll see." Teddy adjusted her gloves and began to cut. She and Cristina began working on the repair. "I think we've got a chance with her. It's not as bad as it could have been."

Bailey nodded. The three women continued with their work in silence for a while before Teddy spoke up again. "I passed Karev and Stevens in the hall. Their first ultrasound is today. It's exciting, right? Them having a baby. I didn't know them when they were together, but she seems like a nice woman. And Alex will be a great dad. Anybody in the hospital could tell you that."

"It's a unique situation, that's for sure," Bailey said with a chuckle. "But they've always been a little ... unconventional. She hated him at the beginning of their internship, But I sensed a vibe. Then I started catching them making out in the locker room. Put an end to that one real quick. Then for some reason or another she stop speaking to him. ..."

"...Olivia." Cristina mumbled, not really interested in reliving the life and times of the singularly most complicated non-couple she had ever known. Teddy on the other hand seemed incredibly interested. She listened intently as Bailey continued to rattle on about her former interns.

"Then there was a bomb in a chest cavity, I'm having a baby and my husband is having Shepard drilling inside his brain, and what are those two doing? Getting nasty in the supply closet."

"Bomb?!"

"You knew about that?"

Bailey looked up at the other two women. "Yes, there was a bomb inside of a man's chest and Grey decided that it would be smart to put her hand in there too. 'Cause my interns were always the ones causing trouble. And of course I knew what was going on, Yang. I know everything that goes on in this hospital."

Teddy glanced up from her work when Bailey paused. "So then what happened? With Stevens and Karev?"

"Denny Duquette." The short woman sighed and shook her head. "Heart patient on his last leg. Charming and handsome. So of course Izzie fell for him and dumped Alex. To make a very, very long story short, he died and she was heart broken. But Alex was there for her. As usual. Then there was a ferry crash. And Alex rescued this pregnant Jane Doe."

"... Ava. Rebecca. Crazy chick," Cristina couldn't help but add in a little bit of commentary.

"He got attached to this patient, which you would have thought he would learn from the Denny debacle. But he didn't, of course. This was about the same time that Stevens was sleeping with George O'Malley, which bothered Alex to no end. He denied it, but it was obvious."

"George O'Malley, as in the resident Callie was married to and who got hit by a bus before I came here. Retractor, please," Teddy asked the scrub nurse.

"The one and only. But that didn't last long. Should have never happened in the first place. And Jane Doe showed up again, claiming to be pregnant with Alex's baby, but it was a hysterical pregnancy and she had to be committed. Then Alex and Izzie finally got it together. Then she got cancer. And they got married, and the rest is history."

"Wow. They've gone through a lot. You sure all this happened in just a few years?"

"Yeah, and that man should be named a saint for forgiving her for what she did. I could have wrung her neck when she left him. But the truth is, he's always had a place in his heart for her. I'm sure of that. I'm glad though, that she's back. They always were at their best when they're around each other." She looked up to find Cristina rolling her eyes. "Yang, I saw that."

"What?"

"You. Rolling your eyes. And don't think I didn't see you slight them a month ago when they found out she was pregnant."

"I didn't slight them," she scoffed.

"Yeah, you kind of did," Teddy spoke up from across the table. "Instead of congratulating them like a normal human being, you got up and walked out. I thought you were at the very least Alex's friend."

"I am."

"Then don't you think you should at least be a little bit supportive of his decision? Maybe you could even think about forgiving Izzie, since he apparently has."

"You have no idea what my issue is with Izzie," Cristina mumbled.

Dr. Bailey looked at the young woman lying on the table. "I don't have any clue what happened between this girl and her sister either, but I do know that before we put her under she was begging me to call her sister and to tell her that she did forgive her and that she was sorry she stay so angry for so long." Her gaze moved up to her former intern. "You can't hold a grudge forever. Then it might be too late."

The older doctors let Cristina stew over that thought in silence for the rest of the surgery, only to bring it up again as they were scrubbing out.

"Is anyone doing a shower for the baby?" Teddy asked as she turned on the faucet.

"I know Grey has mentioned it," Bailey said, "but let's face it event planning is not her thing. I'll talk to her and see what help she's going to need. I'll let you know."

"I went to one baby shower where ..." Teddy's voice was interrupted by a frustrated groan from Cristina's direction. Forcefully turning off the water, she walked out of the scrub room, leaving Teddy and Bailey in her wake.

"She is never going to let whatever's bothering her go, is she?" the blonde doctor asked.

"I hope she will. But she's too stubborn for her own good." Bailey shook her head and removed the cap from her head. "We tried. What else can we do? She heard us, so maybe it just needs to simmer for a while."

"So, about the shower ..."

* * *

"Right there is your baby. He or she is looking exactly like it should at this stage of development."

Neither one of them could take their eyes off of the image on the screen.

Alex had seen these pictures a thousand times during his career but this was different. This was his child on the screen. He fought not to let his emotions show too much, but the smile on his face was unwavering. He felt her hand in his, squeezing gently. He looked over at her and saw the moisture forming in her eyes.

Izzie couldn't help but get emotional looking at the tiny spot on the screen. For so long she had waited for this. She had been so afraid to talk to Alex, to ask him to forgive her and to help her with this. Now he was standing beside her, holding her hand, being the best friend he could. She still felt that she didn't deserve his kindness. But they had moved beyond the past and for that she was grateful. She could be this baby's mother and have Alex in her life.

* * *

The next day, Izzie walked into the office that was now fully hers, smile still on her face. Shoving her bag into a drawer, she moved to sit down in her chair. Looking around her desk, a small package wrapped in beautiful ivory paper caught her eye. She glanced around the room and then picked it up. There was a card underneath it, so she opened that first.

_Iz,_

_Thought you might want this where you could see it all the time. _

_Alex_

Her eyebrows furrowed as she carefully unwrapped the package. Inside was a beautiful silver picture frame with an even more beautiful picture inside. The baby. Her baby. Their baby. A soft giggle escaped from her lips as she looked at the little spot on the photo. She tossed the paper away and set the frame on the left side of her desk next to her computer, where it could be in her line of sight most of the time.

Now the only problem would be to keep herself from staring at it all day.

"Izzie," Derek walked in, interrupting her thought process. "Can you find that memo about the budget for me? I know I had a copy but I can't seem to find it."

"Sure." She turned and looked at her boss. "And let me know next time you're going to be in surgery. Your desk needs reorganizing." She grinned up at him.

"It does not. ... Not really. ... Okay fine."

She was glad that they had settled into a professional relationship that was comfortable for both of them. They were constantly joking around, and she was constantly nagging him about the piles of paper on his desk. I wasn't messy, just disorganized. "Twenty bucks says I find the budget memo while I'm cleaning up."

"Last time I fell for that I wound up paying for twelve cartons of ice cream. No thanks." He smiled at her a disappeared into his office. She laughed at his comment, and then with a sigh, turned on her computer and began her work for the day.

* * *

NEXT CHAPTER:_"Cristina, stop talking!" The fear Izzie's voice was strangled and apparent, and caused Cristina to turned around. She wasn't expecting to see the other woman doubled over leaning against the cabinet, face pale and covered with fear._

**REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!!!!!**


	11. Chapter 11

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 11**_

_Hold on to your hats, folks. I don't want anyone freaking out at the end of this chapter, so you'll just have to trust me. Also in this chapter, Cristina comes to Izzie for forgiveness. This was the very first chapter that I finished on the whole, so its been finished for a while. I've been shocked and pleasantly surprised by all of the reviews and reaction to this story so far, and I'm thrilled that you are all taking this journey with me. It means a lot to hear from all of you. You know the deal: **You review. I post chapters. We're all happy. :)**_

* * *

The pains had started as just a pinch in her lower spine. She'd felt the first bit around lunchtime. But it quickly disappeared and she refused to dwell on it. Sitting at her desk, the pain had returned, slightly stronger. She glanced at the ultrasound picture like she had everyday in the weeks that it had been there. Staring at the photo, she chastised herself for worrying. She'd just go visit Dr. Campbell before she left for the day, if the pain didn't stop.

Forcing herself back to work, Izzie was placing new staff files in a filing cabinet when she heard her office door open and close. Finding Cristina just inside the office surprised her. The doctor stared back at her, clearly wanting to say something, but no words would come.

"Cristina?"

"You left." The accusation confused Izzie until she continued. "I worked my ass off to keep you alive. I wanted you to live Izzie. I wasn't just doing it for you, I was doing it for all of us. I know I may not be a touchy-feely, lovey-dovey type of person like you are, but every other thing in my life was falling apart when you were sick. My career was going no where. Owen had gone all PTSD on me. I was alone but I was fighting to keep what we had, the five of us, together. I wanted to save you because that's what I do! I fix things. I wanted to fix you and fix all of us. Then George jumped in front of that stupid bus, and you flatlined. I stood there watching your husband fall apart in front of me, not able to do anything because of that damn DNR. I was so freaking thrilled when Chief Webber said to screw the DNR, because I had a chance to save your life."

"... Cristina." Izzie said softly as the nagging pain began to tear at her from the inside out.

But the other woman was on a roll. "And we did save your life. I saved you! But you still gave up. Left everything in shambles. What you did was beyond horrible. Give us, give me hope that for once, everything was going to be ok, and then you walk away."

The pain radiating in her back had become unbearable in the few minutes that Cristina had been talking and pacing around the office. Now her words were muffled and no longer making sense to Izzie.

"Cristina," her whisper was a bit louder than before.

"No, I'm not through yet -- "

"Cristina, stop talking!" The fear Izzie's voice was strangled and apparent, and caused Cristina to turned around. She wasn't expecting to see the other woman doubled over leaning against the cabinet, face pale and covered with fear.

"Oh my God! What hurts, Izzie?" The doctor rushed to her side, not exactly sure what was wrong.

"I ... I think its the baby. Oh, God. This can't be happening. Not after everything." Cristina urged her to sit down as tears began streaming down the blonde's face. "I need Alex," was all she could gasp out as the pain tightened its grip on her body.

"Okay. I will get him, but you have to calm down, Izzie. This can't be good for you or the baby." Cristina's words quieted her sobs only slightly, but she forced herself to contol her breathing.

The sound of the door opening was a relief to both women. "Izzie, where is the Coleman ch--" Derek's words faded as he saw the scene at Izzie's desk. "What happened?" He rushed to his assistant's side.

"I was talking to her and she just doubled over. She thinks it's the baby."

"Damn it." Derek picked her up gently. "I'm going to get her to the ER. You go get Dr. Robbins or another senior resident to take over for Karev. He is elbow deep in a twelve year old's abdomen, so do not, under any circumstances, tell him what happened until he's out of that OR. Do you understand me?"

Cristina nodded and rushed off to do as she had been told. Derek went in the other direction, toward the ER, ignoring the stares of the people around them. He entered the area with Izzie in his arms moaning in anguish, shocking all of the doctors in sight. Bailey was the first one to take charge.

"Somebody grab a gurney. What the hell happened?"

"Yang was talking to her in her office, and then she just doubled over in pain. It's the baby, I'm pretty sure." He couldn't keep the sadness from his blue eyes.

Bailey nodded and began shouting orders at the doctors, nurses and interns around them. "Somebody stat page Campbell in OB. Get a CBC, Chem 7. Make sure we get accurate hemoglobin counts and HCG levels." She turned to Derek who had moved into monitoring her BP closely. "Did you page Karev?"

"He's in surgery. I sent Yang to get him out of there and let him know what was going on."

Bailey nodded and continued to examine Izzie, cringing at the sight of blood seeping out against her pants.

* * *

"Bulloch, why am I using this stitch?"

The redheaded intern looked into the body cavity, trying to come up with an acceptable answer that would prevent him from working another shift in the pit. "Well, um, Dr. Karev, I think you are using that one because it allows you to get to the artery at a better angle."

"Exactly." Alex nearly laughed at the relief the fell over the young man's face. "Might make a surgeon out of you yet."

"Dr. Karev, I need you to scrub out." He looked up from his work as an already-scrubbed in Arizona Robbins instructed the nurses to get her a gown and gloves.

"What the hell, Dr. Robbins? I'm doing fine here."

She walked over to the table and looked the man in the eyes, willing him to understand. "You need to leave the OR and scrub out right now, Dr. Karev." She glanced over into the scrub room at Cristina. Alex followed her line of sight and knew something was wrong. Cristina's eyes told him as much.

He turned the surgery over to his mentor and exited into the scrub room, yanking his gown and gloves off as he moved. "What's going on?" he asked her as he turned on the faucet. The woman stood quiet. "Cristina!"

"It's Izzie. She collapsed. Shepard took her to the ER." She didn't even get to finish before he sprinted out of the room. She took off after him, unsure of what they would find down stairs.

* * *

"What are her stats?" Dr. Campbell demanded as she walked into the room. Derek filled her in, explaining the circumstances and Izzie's symptoms. "Okay, somebody get me an ultrasound machine and I need to set up for a pelvic."

Izzie lay on the table, still writhing pain, but her moans and sobs had quieted. She reached for Dr. Bailey as she checked her stats. "I need Alex," she repeated in a whisper.

"I know. I know, Izzie," she soothed. "They are getting him. He'll be here soon. But you need to focus on you and that baby right now." She brushed the hair away from her former intern's face, wishing she could take some of the pain away.

"Izzie, it's Dr. Campbell," the OB leaned over to look Izzie in the eyes. "I'm going to do a pelvic exam to see what's going on, okay?"

"I'll give you some privacy," Derek said, pausing to speak to Izzie. "Do you need anything else?"

She shook her head. He squeezed her shoulder and disappeared through the door. The door had barely closed before it opened again, and Alex rushed into the room. He was immediately at Izzie's side. "What happened?"

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Alex." Tears stained her face, but what concerned him the most was how pale she was.

"Shh, Iz. It's okay. Whatever it is, we'll deal with it." He wrapped a comforting arm around her as much as he could while Dr. Campbell was examining her, and held on to her hand. He continued to softly whisper reassuring words in her ear as the uncomfortable exam wrapped up. They both waited with bated breath when the OB looked up and pulled off her gloves.

"The baby?" Izzie asked weakly.

"I want to see what the ultrasound tells me first, okay?" The older woman looked down at her patient with a smile that didn't entirely reach her eyes.

A nurse set up the machine and the cold gel was soon spread across Izzie belly. No one in the room expected to see anything good.

An audible gasp fell from Izzie's mouth when the picture came up on the screen.

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_**  
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_**Review time … Yes, you!**_


	12. Chapter 12

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 12**_

_Okay first of all, WOW! 100 reviews. I've never reached that point with any of my stories. Thanks so much! Second, so sorry about the cliffhanger. It just kind of happened like that. I hope you'll all enjoy this chapter enough that you can forgive me for doing that to you all. I think you will all like the way that this chapter turns out. :) Anyway, **Thanks for the reviews again and keep them coming! I love them!**_

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"Derek! Cristina! What's going on? I just got paged down here 911." Meredith flew down the hallway toward the exam room she had been paged to. The looks on the faces standing outside caused fear to course through her body. Something bad had happened.

"I paged you, Meredith." Derek said as he put his arms on his wife's shoulders. "I had to bring Izzie down here. She was cramping and started bleeding."

"Oh, God. the baby." The shock in her green eyes morphed into sadness. "Alex was in surgery. Does he -- "

"He's already in there with her. So is Dr. Campbell. We don't know anything yet. I just thought you might want to be here. Just in case."

She nodded silently and slid down the wall, sitting next to her best friend.

There was an eerie, heart-breaking silence in the hall. It was like they'd all been there before. When Cristina lost her baby. In the OR when George died. Waiting for Izzie to get out of any of her numerous surgeries. The quietness brought more fear to Meredith, and she wished that someone would say something.

Derek's pager went off, the squeal piercing the heaviness in the air. "Damn. I've got to take this. I'll make sure to clear your schedules. They may need some friends after this. Keep me posted." He leaned down, placing a kiss on Meredith's head. She nodded up at him and he disappeared around the corner.

"How did this happen. Everything was okay again."

Cristina looked at the woman on her left and ran her fingers through her dark curls. "I was yelling at her."

"What do you mean, yelling at her?" Mer couldn't keep the accusation out of her voice.

"I don't know ... I've been thinking things through and I wanted to clear the air. I didn't mean to upset her. It just ... " her voice faded out with a shake of her head.

Meredith contemplated this for a few minutes. Bringing her legs up to her chest, she let out a sight. "It's not your fault. This probably would have happened no matter what. But I understand how you feel. I never told you this, but when you had your ectopic pregnancy I thought it was because I made you jog that morning. I asked Bailey if it was my fault. She told me that it wasn't, but I still felt horrible. So I get where you're coming from."

Knowing that Cristina was fighting tears, Meredith wrapped an arm around her friend, both silently hoping for the best.

* * *

A miracle or a mistake, Izzie couldn't tell. But without a doubt it was there.

A baby was still on the screen.

Not just tissue, but an actual fetus.

"Dr. Campbell?" Alex stuttered.

The doctor looked up at them. "Well, there is some residual tissue in the uterus right here," she pointed out. "That would explain the pain and bleeding. Izzie, you were expecting twins. Not uncommon with IVF. We couldn't tell in the earlier pictures because, apparently one was in front of the other one. You did miscarry one of the babies, but its brother or sister seems to be doing fine."

Izzie couldn't look at the man beside her. It was almost as if he could read her mind, when he spoke to her softly. "Iz, it wasn't your fault. These things just happen. We can't control them. We're lucky though. You're still pregnant." He somehow knew she was blaming herself.

"He's right, Izzie." Dr. Campbell spoke up. "I know that loosing a baby is difficult. But the baby you still have is a gift. We're going to do everything we can to make sure that you carry this one to term. But you're going to have to be a little more careful. I want you to stay here overnight for treatment and observation and then you'll have to stay on bed rest for a least two weeks. After that we'll play it by ear."

She nodded sadly, not looking at anyone.

"Iz, look at me." Alex put his hand on her chin and made her face him. "You're going to get through this, okay. You owe it to yourself and you owe it to me to try to move past this. But more than that, you owe it to our other baby. The one who can still have life. Please. Promise me that you will try."

"Okay," she nodded, determination filling her eyes. "For the baby we still have, I'll try."

* * *

"Alex! What happened? Is Izzie okay?" Meredith stood as soon as he exited the exam room. "What about the baby?" He knew she could see the range of emotions playing on his face and the unshed tears in his eyes. The look in her eyes made it clear that she assumed the worst.

"She lost one of the babies."

Confusion lit up in both women's faces. "Wait? What? What do you mean 'one of the babies'?" Meredith asked.

Alex sighed and ran a hand down his face. "Twins. It was twins. But she only lost one. She's still pregnant."

Cristina and Meredith were speechless.

"Yeah, I know. We were shocked too. I ... She asked me to talk to Derek. Dr. Campbell wants her on bed rest for at least two weeks. Bailey's going to get her into a room for the night. I'm going to go find -- "

"How is she taking it?" Cristina surprised both of them when she spoke up.

"I don't think she knows how to deal with it. She lost one of her babies. But she gets a second chance. She's conflicted. Scared. I don't know."

The three of them stood there in silence for what felt like for ever, when Cristina excused herself quietly leaving Alex and Meredith behind.

"Alex?"

"I'm okay. Not really sure how to handle this. I'm as confused as she is. I mean she lost a baby. We lost a baby, Mer. But she can still carry the other baby to term. She promised me she would try to get past this." He leaned back against the wall and looked down at his tiny friend. "I just don't know how to help her. This is different than cancer. I'm not her husband and I don't know what the boundaries are."

"Maybe the boundaries are only in your head. This is still your baby and she is your friend and you all need one another to survive. Just be there for her. We're all behind you." She placed a hand on his shoulder. "You talk to Derek and I'll go sit with Izzie." She sent him a smile and moved into the exam room.

Taking one quick glance in the window, reassuring himself that Izzie was fine, Alex headed down the hall. He knew that looking for Derek was supposed to be his mission but he found himself taking a detour. Looking out over the city, he leaned up against the wall of the roof.

He had fought against the tears building in his eyes until he couldn't fight it anymore. The salty paths found their way down his face as he pounded his fist into the concrete barrier. It wasn't hard enough to do any damage, but just hard enough to feel the pain somewhere other than in his heart. For the baby they lost. For the fact that the other baby could meet the same fate. For the fact that Izzie was counting on him. For the fact that he wasn't sure he could handle it all. For that, he let himself break for just a few minutes.

Then he turned and went on with his search for Derek.

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_A side note: I don't know medical stuff. I just did quite a bit of research to find out if this is possible. Apparently its more common than a lot of people know. If the details are off, my apologies. _

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	13. Chapter 13

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 13**_

_So this is a long-ish chapter. I just couldn't stop myself. It's far lighter than the last few chapters have been but too much drama is a bad thing. Just trying to achieve a nice balance here. Someone asked how far along Izzie is now. I've been a little ambiguous about this on purpose, but give or take, she'd be around 8-9 weeks along. Anyway, **you all have been awesome with the reviews. I love them and they make me want to write that much better and that much faster. So keep them coming!**_

* * *

A beam of sunlight splintering into the room through the blinds crossed over Izzie's eyes, waking her from her sound sleep. Immediately her hands went to her still flat stomach, and pausing for a second she went through a mental check list. No pain. No bleeding. Nothing that would make her think she needed to go back to the hospital. She had gone through this every time she woke up since she'd been released from the hospital. The constant fear that something was going to happen to her remaining child was enough to make her paranoid.

Glancing over to her alarm clock, she saw that it was already 10:30. Yawning and rubbing her eyes, she listened for any sign of life around Meredith's house. When she was being discharged from the hospital, Alex and Meredith decided that she shouldn't ever be alone, so they would trade off being at the house. Izzie was beginning to really hate Izzie Watch. She was on bed rest, but she wasn't an invalid.

"Meredith!" She knew that in this massive house it would be more sensible to call her cell, because it wasn't likely that her friend was in ear shot, but she had to try. "Mer!"

"You okay?" Izzie was surprised when Cristina rounded the corner. Up to that point only Meredith, Alex or Derek had been her babysitter.

"Cristina. Where's Meredith? Or Alex?"

"Alex is at work and Mer had an appointment with one of those ritzy preschools they're trying to get Georgia in. She and the rugrat left about twenty minutes ago. So I'm here."

"Oh. Okay."

The two looked at each other awkwardly. They hadn't spoken since Derek took Izzie to the ER. Finally Cristina stepped further into the room. "Do you need something?"

"Oh. Um. I'm a little hungry. But if you don't want to, I can..." her voice tapered off as she pushed the comforter off of her.

"Freeze, Blondie. I was given strict orders not to let you out of the bed except if you have to pee. Do you have to pee?"

"No."

"Well then get your ass back in the bed. Derek threatened to keep me out of the OR, Meredith said she'd tell Joe never to give me tequila again and Alex said he'd make my life miserable. He could do it too. Just so you know, your ex-husband can be a real pain in the ass sometimes. So said you're hungry? How about some cereal? I can't cook but I can put cereal in a bowl."

Izzie got a little lost during Cristina's rant that she just nodded. "Yeah. Okay. Thanks Cristina."

She disappeared but quickly reappeared with a tray containing a bowl of cereal and a glass of orange juice in her hands. Setting it next to Izzie, Cristina watched as she took a bite and nodded approvingly. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." She turned to walk out of the room but was stopped by Izzie's voice.

"I get it." Cristina looked back at her, eyes displaying confusion at her comment. "I get now why you were mad. From what you said the other day. I am sorry for leaving. For getting you involved and then taking off."

"We shouldn't talk about this now. You know what happened last time."

"Cristina, you had nothing to do with me losing the baby." Izzie swallowed a lump in her throat, fighting to keep her composure. "You know as well as anybody that these things just happen. I realize that now. And Alex made me promise not to dwell on it. So I'm not. I'm focusing on the baby I still have. So just talk to me."

"Izzie, I just ... " She sat on the end of the bed, letting out a sigh. "I should have let it go years ago. I know that. For so long I looked at patients as just that ... patients. But with you it was more than that and I did everything I could to save you. When you left it was like all of my hard work was for nothing. My feelings were hurt but I shouldn't have treated you like I have since you came back."

"I deserved it. Not just from you. I deserved it from Alex and Meredith and everyone else. You have no idea how many times I wished I could just go back and talk to Alex before I left the first time. Then none of the other stuff would have happened."

Cristina looked down at her hands. "You made some bad choices, but then again we all have."

"I need you, Cristina. I don't want us to live the rest of our lives avoiding each other, especially with me living here now. Can you forgive me?"

Cristina looked away for a second, and then turned back to look the blonde in the eyes. "There was a patient in the OR weeks ago. When they put her under she was begging Bailey to tell her sister that she was sorry she held a grudge for so long. That girl had no idea if she was going to live or die. We almost lost her a few times. Right before I came to talk to you the other day, she was discharged. Her sister came to pick her up. I saw them together and I thought about our intern year. How things should have turned out. I don't want to hold that grudge anymore. And I don't want to push you away when you're trying. So, I'll forgive you for walking out if you forgive me for acting like such a bitch."

"Done." The pair smiled at each other and Izzie knew that everything was going to be okay. It was like a huge burden had been lifted off her shoulders.

Before it could get awkward again, Cristina crawled up to the empty side of the bed and made herself comfortable. "So what's on TV?"

Izzie grabbed the remote and flipped on the television, scanning the channel guide. "Oh, Jeopardy marathon on the Game Show Network."

Cristina rolled her eyes. "I could so win at Jeopardy. Sometimes I wonder how some of the contestants even made it through the preliminary rounds. Stupid people. The questions are too easy."

Izzie chuckled at the typical Cristina comment. "Is that a challenge?"

"You're on, Barbie."

* * *

"ABBA!"

"How the hell did you know that?"

"My mom was a fan. That's another 200 points for me ... "

Izzie looked down and began totaling up the points as the show went to commercial. She smiled to find that yet again, she was in the lead. She was about to brag to Cristina, when they both looked up and saw Meredith leaning in the doorway.

"Hey you two. What's going on?"

"I'm kicking Cristina's ass in Jeopardy." Izzie said with a smile, waving the piece of paper around in front of her.

"Only because they're asking ridiculous questions. Why would I waste my time knowing about Broadway and stupid Norwegian music groups."

"Swedish. But You also didn't know any of the celebrity couples category or the American history questions either. And you just gave up on the children's literature category.," Izzie taunted, causing Cristina to scowl at her.

"So should I take this as a good sign?" Meredith moved farther into the room. "You two are arguing about trivia questions instead of fighting with each other?"

Cristina and Izzie grinned at each other. "We're good now," Cristina said.

"Thank God! I wasn't sure you'd ever get past it. Now move over." She pushed Cristina to the middle of the bed and propped up against the pillows. "So how are you feeling, Iz?"

"Pretty good today. A little sick of this bed, but whatever. Where's Georgia?"

"She fell asleep in the car on the way back over. I put her in her bed and she didn't wake up. Just curled up around her blankie and started snoring."

"Wonder where she gets that from." Cristina mumbled, causing all of them to laugh.

Izzie couldn't help but be taken back to the time when the three of them would cram on the couch at Meredith's old house and watch the old surgery tapes of Ellis Grey's. George would have been in the comfy old chair and Alex would sit on the floor next to her legs. How much had changed since that first year. She didn't think about George very often anymore. It hurt too much, knowing how disappointed he would have been at her for running. It was the one thing she was glad that he wasn't around to see. But he also wouldn't be around to meet her baby. He never met Georgia. Emotions started rising within her, when Cristina spoke up again.

"I'm hungry. It's lunch time and I know for a fact that you have nothing in your pantry, Mer."

"I want pizza. Is there a frozen pizza?"

"No you ate the last one yesterday, Iz." Meredith thought for a moment, and then pulled her phone from her pocket and dialed a number. "Alex should be getting off work soon. We'll get him to bring us one." Her smirk grew as he answered. "Hey Alex, can you bring us a pizza? ... No, we're just hungry. It's lunchtime. Yes, I realize that you've worked a twelve hour shift. ..."

"Put him on speaker," Izzie whispered. Meredith did as she was asked.

" ... all the way out to your house when my apartment is two miles from the hospital," Alex's voice could be heard by all of them mid-rant.

"Alex," Izzie interrupted sweetly.

"Iz?"

"Yeah, it's me. Look, I know you've had a hard night. But your baby really, really wants pizza. We'd, I mean, it would be really appreciative if you'd do this. I'm doing all I can to keep it safe and warm and healthy. The least you could do is pick up a pizza and help keep me and the baby properly nourished."

Cristina snorted, but quickly covered her mouth when Alex sighed and finally relented. "Fine. Okay I'll be out there in about an hour. I've got to check on one more patient."

"Thank you, Alex." The sugary tone of Izzie's voice had the other two women in near hysterics as she turned off the phone. They dissolved into giggles immediately.

"Oh my God! He's just a whipped as he was when you two were married. Maybe more so. He cannot tell you no, can he?" Cristina looked at the woman next to her.

"He can try. He's so excited about the baby, though. I did hate to use that against him, but I really, really wanted pizza."

"So, more Jeopardy?"

* * *

"Charles Dickens!"

"Can't be Dickens. He was British. It's Whitman."

Alex heard their voices before he got to Izzie's room, not entirely sure what the yelling was about. He turned the corner to find Meredith, Cristina and Izzie lined up in the bed, eyes glued to the television. He looked up to find Alex Trebeck answering the question that none of the contestants knew. "The correct question is 'Who is Walt Whitman?'."

"Ha, I told you!" Cristina scowled as Izzie through her hands up in victory.

"Cristina, she really is kicking your ass." Meredith giggled.

"No she's not! What's the score?"

Meredith looked down at the tablet of paper in her lap and took a moment to add up the point totals. "9,750 to 6,500."

"I've still got final Jeopardy," Cristina said stubbornly.

He finally decided to make his presence known. "I had a dream like this one time. Except with less clothes and less trivia."

"Ugh. You're disgusting. Izzie, are you sure you want him being dad to your kid?"

Izzie giggled at Cristina. "Hmmm ... After that comment, I'm not so sure. But I guess it's too late now. Oh well, at least my baby will look pretty. Might be dumb as a brick or a chauvinist pig, but cute, nonetheless." She smiled up at her ex. "Did you bring the pizza?"

"Yeah." He sat the two boxes on the nightstand and sat on the edge of the bed, next to Izzie.

Meredith sat up and threw her feet back over the side of the bed. "I'm going to go get plates and check on Georgia."

"I'll come with you."

Meredith and Cristina exited the room, leaving Alex and Izzie alone.

"How are you feeling?"

"Good. Better than I've felt in a few days, at the very least. I made up with Cristina. So that helps." She looked up with him, a touch of sadness marring her face.

He nodded, knowing where her thoughts went. "Good. I'm glad."

"So how was work?"

"It was fine, I guess. Had this six-year-old kid, Caleb, come in with a neuroblastoma. Pretty severe. He's had a rough go of it, passed around from foster home to foster home. His social worker said that he got taken away from his mom two years ago after she was caught dealing drugs in the living room, with him and his baby sister in the next room. Dad's long gone. His sister is in a foster home that wants to adopt her, but they don't want him. And the poor kid insists that his mom is going to come for him. Social worker said that she's in a halfway house right now and when she does get out, who knows what will happen."

"What's his prognosis?"

"That's what we're trying to figure out. I hope so. He's a good kid despite everything he's been through. Smart, too." A smile cracked on Izzie's face. "What?"

"Nothing," she said. "I just haven't really seen you in pedes-surgeon mode. It's sweet." He cracked a smile, hoping she couldn't see his embarrassment. "Now hand over the food."

"Mer went to get plates."

"Plates are for wimps. I need pizza."

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Up next: _A cat wears a hat, Spiderman is spotted and Izzie goes to the ER ..._

_**Yep you guessed it, I'd really, really, really like reviews!**_


	14. Chapter 14

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 14**_

_So do you want the good news or the bad news? Well, the good news is that I have the last six chapters of this story completely finished. The bad news is that there are about four or five chapters in between now and then that aren't quite as ready as I'd like them to be. I pride myself in not sitting on chapters for too long and posting regularly. Just know that after the next chapter things might be a little bit slower in coming. Please don't give up on me! I'm just dealing with a tiny case of writers block. **But a great cure for that is reviews. So help me out and let me know what you think!**_

_***Oh, and a little disclaimer here: **_

_I do not own 'The Cat in the Hat.' _

_Only Dr. Seuss, himself, can say that._

_(see what I did there … ;) )_

* * *

Being back at work, al beit only two days a week and under the strict requirements of rest periods every two hours and staying off her feet gave Izzie something to focus on other than losing one of her babies. Having her friends around her helped get her past the worst of it, but they couldn't rid her of the guilt or the memories of the pain she felt weeks before. Placing her hand on her barely rounded stomach, she wished she was in the point of her pregnancy where she could feel the baby move, just as a reassurance. It would happen soon enough, she knew, and Dr. Campbell assured her that everything seemed normal at her check up.

Alex had been wonderful through it all, if not entirely overprotective. He stopped in every half hour, and if he was in surgery or couldn't stop by, Meredith or Cristina did his dirty work for him. Derek, too, had been super attentive, reminding her constantly to take it easy, not to stand for long periods of time and to take naps every few hours. She was beginning to get what Meredith was talking about. She did feel like she was under secret service surveillance twenty four hours a day.

Rising from her chair, she picked up the file that needed to be signed by the head ER nurse. It was nothing heavy and she would take the elevator, so she knew it was a job she could do herself. No since in bothering anyone else for such a menial task.

Walking across the bridge, she noticed a little redheaded boy with freckles and glasses wheeling himself in a wheel chair heading toward her. He smiled up at her. "Hi! Don't tell him I'm here."

She looked around, wondering who he was talking about when she heard a familiar voice. "Caleb!" She looked up and saw Alex coming around the corner clearly looking for someone. She turned to look at the boy behind her but he had suddenly vanished. Glancing down the hall she saw the tip of a Spider Man bedroom slipper peering out from behind a shelf of supplies.

"Iz, have you seen a little boy with red hair and glasses? About six?"

"Nope, no six-year-olds here," she said loud enough where the child could here her. But instead of shaking her head no, she nodded and pointed behind her. "Haven't seen any red heads either."

He looked over her shoulder and spotted the slippers. "Thanks," he whispered. His voice then returned to normal volume. "Why are you up walking around? You're supposed to be taking it easy."

"I was going down to the ER." She noted the panic on his face and quickly finished the sentence. "... to get this file signed by the head nurse. As soon as I got that, I was going to take a break and lay down on Derek's couch. I'm not over doing it, I promise."

She watched as his face relaxed. "Okay, but see that you do take that break soon. I'll come check on you in a little bit."

"Fine," she smiled up at him. She was becoming accustomed to the warmth in his eyes again but forced herself to not let it get to her. Running her fingers through her hair, she glanced behind her. "But right now, I think your patient is trying to escape again."

"Crap." He moved around her and watched the boy moving down the hall again. "Caleb!" He took off in a run, and she laughed the rest of the way down to the ER.

* * *

"Hey, Dr. Robbins." The doctor looked up from the chart and smiled at the woman heading toward her. "Have you seen Alex?"

"Izzie, it's Arizona. I'm not Dr. Robbins unless patients or parents are around. I see no patients or parents anywhere in this hallway. I've told you this before. Now, I'm not one hundred percent sure where Alex is. Everything alright? You feeling okay?"

She rolled her eyes at having to answer the same question for the forth time in about an hour. "Yeah great. We just rode in together and I knew that he was supposed to finish his shift twenty minutes ago."

"Well, he's not in surgery. I'd check room 2314. He probably got talked into stopping by before he left." With a cheerful smile the older woman excused herself and Izzie went in search of her ride. She heard his voice, or a modification of his voice, before she actually found the room. What she found stopped her in her tracks.

_"'Look at me, _

_Look at me now,' said the cat,_

_With a cup and a cake_

_On the top of my hat! _

_I can hold up the fish!_

_And a little toy ship!_

_And some milk on a dish!_

_And look!_

_I can hop up and down on the ball!_

_But that is not all!_

_Oh, no._

_That is not all..."_

Alex was seated on a stool next to the bed, dressed in street clothes, blue book in his hands. The little redheaded boy sitting cross-legged in the bed grinned at him as he read the book with gusto.

As Alex turned the page, the child looked up at the doorway. "Hey it's you. From this morning. Thanks for not telling him where I was!" His grin revealed a missing front tooth.

Izzie moved further into the room, smile lighting up her face as she looked over at Alex, whose face was flush from embarrassment. She sent him a look of amusement and then moved her eyes back over to Caleb. "You are very welcome."

"I'm Caleb." He held out his hand, and Izzie took it in her own and shook it.

"Nice to see you again, Caleb. I'm Izzie. You must be a really good patient for your doctor to be reading to you like this."

"Dr. Alex said if I didn't run off again that he'd read to me before he left."

Izzie couldn't help but giggle and raise an eyebrow at her ex-husband. "Bribery, Dr. Alex?"

He shrugged. "The kid drives a hard bargain, but I figured it was a fair trade." Their eyes met and their grins mirrored one another and she knew that this was something she could tease him about endlessly for a while. From the look on his face, he was expecting it. "Sorry about not letting you know that I'd be a little late."

"It's fine." She sat down in the chair at the foot of the bed.

"You two know each other?" They both looked over at Caleb when he spoke up.

"Well, we work together, but we're really good friends, too." Alex said. Izzie could tell he was hoping the precocious kid wouldn't ask too many other questions. How do you explain their situation to a kid, when most adults didn't even understand it.

"I don't have any friends that are girls. Most of them are icky."

"Well, I'm a girl? Does that make me icky?" Izzie asked innocently.

Caleb looked at her, clearly sizing her up on a scale of ickiness. He tapped his finger against his chin, deep in thought. "No. You're not icky. Will you be my friend?"

"I will be your friend. In fact, I know that we already have something in common. I love Dr. Seuss, too. Except 'Green Eggs and Ham' is my favorite."

"I've never heard that one. It can't be better than 'Cat in the Hat'."

"Never heard 'Green Eggs and Ham'?! Seriously?" She looked at the boy in disbelief. "Well, we'll have to do something about that soon. Would you like me to come read it to you one day?"

"You'd do that?" he asked excitedly.

"Sure. I'll have to find my old copy, but maybe next week sometime?" Caleb nodded vigorously. "But right now what I want is to hear Dr. Alex finish 'Cat in the Hat'."

"Yeah!"

Alex glared at her and she held back a giggle as he began to read again. As his funny voices rang out throughout the room, she couldn't help but wonder if this is what bedtimes would be like for their child. Her heart sank a bit. Would it be one week at mom's and one week at dad's? They hadn't really gotten that far in figuring things out. Would she ever have the chance to watch him do this for their child? He was such a wonderful man and would be a wonderful father. She fought to swallow the lump forming in her throat.

Why had she left him in the first place? The question bounced around her head, the answer colliding with it time and time again. She shouldn't have left him in because she never really stopped loving him. She had been angry with him. But the love was still there buried underneath her self doubt all these years.

As Alex neared the end of the book sadness swept over her, knowing that there was nothing she could do about her realization. She lost that chance years ago when she left him. She had no right to convince him to love her again. The fear that she would screw it up again would keep her from trying.

"The end."

She looked up at him, plastering a smile on her lips, determined to keep this quiet. Apparently she wasn't good enough.

"You okay?" The look of concern in his eyes made her shake her head.

"Uh, yeah, I'm fine. Just a little tired."

"Okay." He turned back to his patient. "Caleb, be good tonight. I don't want the nurses telling me you gave them trouble when I get back tomorrow morning."

"Okay. I'll be good." He looked over at Izzie. "You'll come back?"

"Absolutely." And with a forced smile she walked out the door, Alex following behind her, unable to see the tears swelling in her eyes.

* * *

_**Don't forget those reviews … they are important!**_


	15. Chapter 15

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 15**_

_So this chapter worked itself out, and escaped the curse of writer's block. I think I'm making pretty good progress, so all systems may be go for me to continue posting regularly. Last night I wrote the epilogue (very pleased with how it turned out!) and planned out the remainder of the story. There will be somewhere between 23-25 chapters total for this story, so we're more than halfway through. S**o enjoy and keep Reviewing! I love those things!**_

_P.S. Teaser at the bottom!_

* * *

"Alex!"

He heard her voice down the hall and looked up in that direction. "Hey. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. Is Caleb awake? I promised him I'd stop by before we left."

Watching Izzie walk toward him he couldn't help but notice that the dress she was wearing emphasized the slight bulge at her waistline. It wouldn't be apparent to anyone who didn't know her, but he knew. His mind wandered back to the flat plane that her stomach used to be and how she used to wriggle underneath him as he kissed and licked his way lower. Forcing himself to turn back to the chart he was reading, he chided himself for even letting those thoughts back in. Better to focus on the baby that was causing her stomach to grow, he told himself.

"Uh, yeah. He should be. I was just going to change, so I'll meet you in his room, okay."

He walked the opposite direction, certain that his quick departure had left her confused in his wake. He knew that the moment he stopped thinking of her as his ex-wife or as just a friend, he was in trouble. His emotions would get involved with something other than the baby and he couldn't let himself be vulnerable to her again. He sighed as he slipped off his scrub top and tossed it into the laundry bin. She was still his biggest weakness after all this time.

By the time he had changed and turned his charts over, he found her sitting next to Caleb's bed as she had so many afternoons in the three weeks since she met the child. Because he was so sick and the state really had no one to take him, he was relegated to room 2314 during his treatment. Dr. Robbins had had to fight for it, but they were granted permission as he underwent his treatment. Tomorrow was his fist surgery.

"Dr. Alex! Did you know that Izzie had to have surgery for her tumors too."

He was surprised by the boys words. "Uh yeah. I did know that." He looked to Izzie for an explanation.

"He wanted to know what being in surgery was like. So I told him about mine," she said in a cheerful voice.

"'Cept she had a doctor drilling into her brain. Isn't that cool!" Izzie giggled at the little boy's excitement, even though Alex wasn't as thrilled to relive the situation. "Did you do her operation, too, Dr. Alex? Like you're going to do mine."

Alex's eyes met Izzie's and she smiled reassuringly, seeming to know where this conversation was taking him. He didn't want to think about those hours during her surgeries when he waited. Or those moments were she couldn't remember anything. Or when she died in his arms. Or when she left. He didn't want to go back there again.

"Caleb, he's a kid surgeon. I was a grown up. I had to have a grown up surgeon do my surgeries." Izzie spoke up.

The boy seemed to accept the answer and move on to another subject. "Dr. Alex? Has my mom called."

Alex was grateful to be talking about something else, but it was hard to explain this to the child. "Not yet, Caleb."

"Oh." Sadness appeared on his face. It broke his heart to see the little boy feeling so alone. Alex knew that feeling. His dad would be gone for weeks at a time. His mom would be drunk or medicated and not really functioning. And he'd be left alone to fend for himself. It could be scary for a kid. Especially one with a life-threatening disease who had to have surgery. "I miss her. I had other mom's look after me but they weren't the same. I remember her, though. She was real pretty. Kind of like you, Izzie. But she was shorter than you. And had hair like mine. I just want to see her again."

Izzie's smile wavered and Alex could see her heart breaking just a little bit. Alex perched on the side of the kid's bed and looked down at him. "Hey, you're going to be fine. You've got me and Dr. Robbins and Izzie looking after you. When you wake up, I promise you, you won't be alone, okay?"

The boy sniffled a bit and pushed his glasses back up his nose. "Okay. Thanks, Dr. Alex."

Alex looked over at Izzie. "You ready?"

She stood up and squeezed Caleb's hand before she walked out the door.

"I will see you first thing in the morning, kid. Get lots of sleep, okay." The boy nodded and Alex ruffled his hair and followed Izzie.

* * *

"What was wrong with you today?"

He glanced over at her sitting in the passengers side of the car. She was staring out the window, her breath fogging up small circles in the glass. "What do you mean?"

"I mean you were a little distant right before we left, Alex. Is something wrong?"

Alex sighed, not really knowing what his problem was. Was it the boy in room 2314? Or was it the thoughts he'd had about Izzie earlier that he couldn't seem to stop thinking about? Or thinking about his family? Or was it the general fear of being a father? He couldn't pin point it. "Not really. I think it's just Caleb. He reminds me a little of me growing up."

She nodded, finally turning to look at him. "I thought that might be it. I also thought that maybe talking about my surgeries or ..."

"No," he interrupted quickly. "I just hate that he's going through all of this alone. It's not right for a kid to be going through so much crap and not have anyone take care of him. But I see it way more often than I'd like."

She nodded sadly and stared back out the window. "So Liza asked me today if we were going to find out the sex of the baby." He had come to realize over the past few months that Izzies ability to change the subject on a dime is one thing that hadn't changed about her. Another thing she and Caleb had in common."I told her we hadn't talked about it. But we should ... talk about it, I mean."

Alex chuckled as he visualized the chatty twenty-something temp that was helping out in Derek's office. She'd been asking Izzie questions about the baby nonstop, and it was beginning to grate on her nerves, he could tell. "Well, I don't have a preference, Iz."

"Okay," she said as she looked down at her hands. "I'd kind of like to know as soon as possible. Is that all right?"

"Yeah. It's fine. It's your choice." He looked over at her and smiled. "What do you want?"

"Huh?"

"The baby? Do you want a boy or a girl?"

"Oh." She paused clearly thinking the question through. "When I spend time with Georgia, I can't help but think that a little girl would be nice. You know, getting to dress her up in pretty things and such. Plus I've seen you with her, too. You'd be good with a daughter."

He grinned keeping his eyes on the road ahead of him, knowing that Izzie was scrutinizing him. A daughter would be nice. Although if she looked like Izzie, he'd knew he'd be spending most of her teenage years fighting off hormone-driven Cassanovas-in-traning. That wouldn't be any fun, he was certain.

"But my motherly instinct is telling me that its a boy."

"One thing I've learned while working in pedes is that you can never underestimate the power of a mother's instinct. I bet it's a boy. Which is cool." The idea of a son excited him. A chance to do right what his father had done so very wrong. He'd take him to little league, play catch with him, make sure that he knew that he was loved.

After a few moments, when the only sound was the low music coming from the radio, she cleared her throat. "Um, Alex."

"Yeah?"

"I know it's too early to talk about names or whatever, but I want to be sure about something. I've been thinking about it a lot. I want this baby to have your name. I don't want my child to just be a Stevens. He or she will have a father who loves it and I don't want anyone to question that. So, boy or girl, the last name will be Stevens Karev. If, um, that's okay with you."

He was speechless for a moment. This was one thing that he hadn't even thought about. "Iz ... I, uh, I don't really know what to say. Are you sure?"

"Alex, you're as much this baby's father as you would be if ..." she hesitated. " ... if we were still married. You deserve to have this child carry on your name. I know that your family name hasn't meant much to you in the past. But maybe it can now. Start new."

He thought about it in silence for a few minutes. At a red light, he looked over at her. She was staring at him, clearly waiting for his answer. Part of him wanted to tell her no, because she was right. He didn't want his child to have any association with his father's name. But her words about starting new, changing the cycle, hit home. His gaze locked with her's and he knew he couldn't tell her no.

"Okay."

* * *

_Teaser: What's it going to be? Boy? Girl? You'll find out in chapter 16!_

**PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!!!**


	16. Chapter 16

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 16**_

_So, here's the deal. Courtesy of the biggest snow storm to hit the U.S. in forever, I have been snowed in for a few days and have pretty much finished this story. There is still some tweaking to do, but all the chapters are pretty much put together. But I'm not going to post them all at one time. That would take the fun out of it, right? This doesn't mean that I don't want to get reviews.** I love reviews and really, really want feedback on this story. I hope you are still enjoying it like I am. So please let me know what you think! Review!!!**_

Teaser at the bottom! :)

* * *

"Everything looks healthy. You've recovered well, Izzie. So the only thing left is if you want to know the sex." Dr. Campbell looked from the screen up into the face of her patient.

Izzie glanced up at Alex and he smiled. She nodded at the OB. "Yeah. We want to know."

She turned the screen around and Izzie searched the screen. She knew Alex was doing the same thing standing beside her. He felt his hand squeeze her shoulder at the same moment that she saw what they were looking for. "Alex. It's a boy," she whispered fighting the tears filling her eyes. Her son. Their son.

She suddenly had visions of her son years from that moment, strong and handsome, full of love and adored by everyone. Her baby would bring together the best parts of her and Alex. She couldn't wait to meet him.

* * *

"I hope they hurry. I'm starving." Izzie looked across the table at Alex.

"Well, the service is always pretty fast here. Not to mention you've been here for lunch at least twice a week since you got off bed rest. They know you by name already," he grinned back at her.

Izzie rolled her eyes, but she knew he was right. The only thing she had wanted lately was Italian food. The casual restaurant a few blocks from the hospital had become a favorite and at this point she had tried almost everything on the menu. "I'm sorry. Last time it was those stupid grapes. At least my taste buds have evolved."

They both got quiet for a few moments each lost in their own thoughts.

"So ... we're having a boy. I knew my instincts were right." Izzie looked at Alex trying to gauge his reaction. There was a subtle nervousness about him. In fact, he'd been like that since the day before. She couldn't put her finger on it, but she knew she hadn't seen him like this since she first showed up. Concern filled her mind. "Alex?"

"What do you want to do about a nursery?"

His random question surprised her. "I can't even think about a nursery right now, Alex. I still have to find a place, which is something I need to do soon. I can't camp out at Mer's for the next five months. I can't imagine her wanting me to start decorating one of her other guest bedrooms as a nursery. And you only live in a one bedroom. I'd say a nursery is way down on the list of things that you and I have to deal with before the baby is born."

"What if I told you I had a solution to that problem."

"A solution?"

He looked away from her questioning gaze and took a deep breath. "Derek called me into his office yesterday. Dr. Anslow is retiring as head of pedes next month."

"Anslow's finally retiring? I thought the old man would die in the scrub room eventually," she rolled her eyes, but not really sure what this had to do with her baby's nursery.

"Dr. Robbins is taking his place," he continued, "which means there will be an attending spot available. Derek told me that they've expedited my application and he wants me to fill the spot."

"Oh my God! Alex, that's great!" She grabbed his hands across the table and squeezed them in her excitement."I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks, Iz." He smiled back at her and she knew he was thrilled about his promotion.

"But what does that have to do with my living situation?" She knew that confusion was written all over her face, but she really had no clue what he was talking about.

"Well, uh, I've been thinking of buying a house. I paid off all of my student loans last year and now with this new position, I can afford something nice. Something with three or four bedrooms. Plenty of room for you and the baby. I mean, if you want to."

The idea took a minute to click in Izzie's brain. "You ... you want me to live with you?"

"I want to be able to be around my kid as much as possible. You and I are getting along fine and I don't see that changing anytime soon." She could see the seriousness in his eyes and knew that this wasn't just a whim for him. He'd thought this through. A lot. "I just think that when he's young he should have both of us around as much as we can be. If it gets complicated, then we'll figure it out when the time comes. But for now, I think it makes sense. Not to mention that Mer will get her guest room back."

Izzie's mind was moving at warp speed. The thought of living in the same house as Alex again gave her goosebumps. She tried to force any thoughts of romance novels and movies from her mind. He wasn't offering himself to her. He was offering her a warm, safe home where he could help her take care of their baby. That was all. She knew she would be stupid to think that it was anything more than that.

"Alex are you sure you want to do this? You've been living by yourself for so long, you must be used to the freedom that comes with that."

He groaned. "Izzie, I go home alone and eat dried cereal and watch TV. I think I'd rather be in a place where I can go home and play with my son everyday ... and eat fresh baked muffins."

"Again with the baked goods," she laughed. "I'll have to think about it, Alex."

He scooted his chair closer to hers. "What's there to think about, Iz? It's the perfect solution."

She could tell by his face that he meant it. That he was totally serious and wouldn't take no for an answer. She felt a smile come over her face. "Okay. Let's do it." He grinned back at her. "Now we just have to figure out how to decorate the nursery. I was thinking puppies."

"Too girly. Baseball?"

"What if he isn't into sports?"

"He'll be an infant. Plus, he's my son. Of course he'll be into sports."

She wrinkled her nose and shook her head. "No sports. Safari?"

"That might be kind of cool, I guess. Race cars?"

"Too dangerous. He might get attached and no son of mine is going to be a race car driver. Look, we don't have to decide now. Not to mention, our food is coming."

* * *

"So who's got money on a girl?"

Derek, Arizona, Bailey and Meredith each through a twenty dollar bill down on the desk beside where Cristina was sitting on the edge of it.

"Boy?" Callie and Teddy made another pile, and Cristina her own bill to their pile.

"Mommy, why are you giving Aunt Cristina money? Is she poor?"

Meredith laughed at her daughter, lifting her up into her lap as she sat in one of the chairs in Izzie's office. Brushing dark curls off her face, she shook her head. "Nope, we're just playing a grown up game where we try to guess whether Uncle Alex and Miss Izzie's baby will be a boy or a girl."

The girl looked deep in thought. "I want them to have a girw. Boys are yucky. I can pway Barbies with a girw." She looked over at Cristina. "I don't haves any money, though. Sorry." The whole room was holding back giggles at the girl. Georgia never ceased to provide entertainment for their group.

Several low conversations began buzzing around the room, when Georgia tapped on her mother's shoulder. "What now sweetie?"

"Mommy," she whispered into her ear, "would it be okay if I start cawwing Miss Izzie Aunt Izzie instead? She's just like Aunt Cristina, cept she can bake. And she smiwes."

"I think she'd love that, sweetie." Meredith pressed a kiss to her forehead, glad they had all made it to this point. Izzie was again part of the family and Alex was happier than she'd seen him in years. She couldn't help the thought in the back of her head that this was the beginning of them getting back together. Maybe, just maybe their timing would be perfect this time.

The door opened, pulling Meredith from her thoughts.

Izzie and Alex looked around, clearly surprised to find their friends in front of them.

"Uh, hey guys. What's going on?" Alex asked.

Georgia ran at him, and he easily lifted her into his arms. "Unca Awex, theys pwaying a game. Theys paying Aunt Cristina and guessing if your baby is a boy or girw. I'm pwaying too, but I don't haves no money."

"Is that so?"

"Yeps! I want you to have a girw, cause boys are yucky and won't pway Barbies with me."

Alex looked at Izzie who was barely containing her laughter. "You're all taking bets? You should have done this earlier, I would have gotten in on it too. I would have won, too!" Izzie grinned at the others.

"So ..." Bailey demanded. "... What is it?"

Alex smiled and looked at Georgia still in his arms. "Will you be okay with a yucky boy cousin, Peaches?"

"Yes!" Cristina shouted, her grin being mirrored by Callie and Teddy. She immediately began to divide out the money. The other grimaced at their lost money, but congratulated the parents-to-be anyway. The noise level began to die off as the surgeons began to exit the office, leaving Meredith, Derek, Alex, Izzie and Georgia alone.

The child wore a pout as she shuffled her feet around the office as the grown ups talked. Izzie noticed this and walked over to her, crouching down next to her. "Georgia? What's wrong, baby?"

"I don't want a boy cousin." A hopeful look spread over her face. "Can you take him back and get a girw?"

Izzie smiled. "I'm afraid it doesn't work like that. We're stuck with a boy. But you know what?"

"What?" she asked dejectedly.

"You're such a big girl now that by the time the he gets here, you'll be able to help us take care of him. You can sing songs to him and teach him his ABC's and make silly faces that will make him laugh. Do you think you might want to do that? Be my big helper?"

The girl thought about it for a second and a grin appeared on her face. "I'm good at my ABCs. And I know wots of songs. And I can make good siwwy faces! See!"

Izzie laughed as she demonstrated. "Very good! You'll be the best cousin ever." She pulled Georgia into a hug.

Her next question was a surprise. "Can I caww you Aunt Izzie? Mommy said it would be okay."

"Nothing would make me happier."

"I love you, Aunt Izzie." The child squeezed her neck and her eyes met Alex's across the room. The smile on his face, a clear indicator that he'd heard everything. And he liked what he heard.

* * *

Next Chapter: _"I understand your concern, Dr. Karev," the woman said stoically. "But there's not much I can do about it. The paperwork has already been started for his transfer. Unless Seattle Grace is willing to cover the cost, Caleb will be transferred sometime tomorrow."_

_**Guess what? Reviews make me very, very happy!**_


	17. Chapter 17

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 17**_

_Okay, so I have to admit that Alex in pedes is one of my favorite things ever, so that's where this chapter came from. A little more info on Caleb and his past. I'm really happy with how the character of Caleb has turned out, so I wanted to have a chapter about him. So read on and Enjoy. Oh and a quick thank you to all of you who are reading! Those of you who read this and review mean so much to me! **Your comments really make me smile and are very much appreciated. So please keep them coming!**_

* * *

"Dr. Karev?"

The unfamiliar voice echoing down the hallway caused him to turn around. A professional-looking woman in a tan business suit walked up to him, a file in her hand. "I'm Alicia Jackson with the Department of Family and Children Services. Dr. Robbins said that you have been handling the Caleb Roberts case?"

"Uh, yeah. He's my patient." Alex crossed his arms over his chest.

"Okay, can we go somewhere and talk?"

"Sure."

A few minutes later Alex was seated across from Ms. Jackson in one of the conference rooms.

"She did what?!" He couldn't hide his anger at what she had just told him.

"His mother left the halfway house today. The first thing she did after leaving was sign away her rights to both Caleb and his sister to the state. Alli will be adopted by the foster family that she's been staying with for the last eight months. Under normal circumstances, he'd stay in a foster home until he was adopted. But with his illness, the likelihood of adoption is zero."

"Does she know that her kid is sick?!" he yelled, unable to control his temper. "That he's already had two major surgeries and is undergoing extensive chemotherapy treatments. He's weak and he's tired and all he keeps asking me is when his mother is going to come and see him. What the hell am I supposed to tell him?"

"She was made aware of the circumstances. But it didn't make a difference. She didn't want anything to do with him or the girl. It's sad, but it's a reality I see all the time."

Alex stood up and started pacing the room. "Okay, so what does this mean? For Caleb?"

Ms. Jackson scanned through her files. "He'll have to be transferred to a public hospital. The only reason they brought him here was because when they first found out he was sick, County was full. There is spot waiting for him now. The state can't pay for a private hospital."

"They can't give him the care he needs at County. They'll throw him in a room with some stranger, pump him full of pain meds and wait for him to die so that they can have the bed."

"I understand your concern, Dr. Karev," the woman said stoically. "But there's not much I can do about it. The paperwork has already been started for his transfer. Unless Seattle Grace is willing to cover the cost, Caleb will be transferred sometime tomorrow."

He could see that she was done talking to him, so left the room, letting the door slam behind him. This wasn't going to happen. Certainly not if he had anything to say about it. Moving down the hall, he was on a mission.

Entering Izzie's office, he expected her to be sitting at her desk. When he found the room empty, he was silently thankful. She would have known that he was frustrated and she would have made him tell her what was wrong. It would only upset her, and that wouldn't be good for her or their son.

"Derek?" Alex knocked as he poked his head inside the chief of surgery's office.

"Hey, Karev. I think Izzie went to grab lunch with Yang." the older man said, looking up from the paperwork on his desk. "If you're looking for her."

"No actually, I wanted to talk to you." He sat down in the chair in front of the desk. "It's about Caleb Roberts. My neuroblastoma case."

Derek sat back in his chair, and Alex could only hope that what he was saying would make sense. He knew that Shepard had a heard of gold, but he also had responsibilities as the chief that may make this awkward. As he rambled on about what Ms. Jackson had said to him, he couldn't help but get angry again.

"... So, I know that it would be a huge expense, but this kid has lost so much already. He's six years old and has no family, no where to go and no one who cares about him. Except here."

Looking thoughtful, Derek nodded at his newest attending. "I'll have to make a few calls Karev. I can't give you a definite answer. But you're right. He shouldn't be moved. I'll see what I can do to make this happen. You'll be around?"

"Yeah." He turned to leave the room, but paused and turned back as he opened the door. "Hey. Thanks for doing this."

* * *

Caleb hadn't been awake when she walked into the room after her lunch with Cristina. She'd sat down next to the bed as he slept, saddened by the toll all of the procedures had taken on his body. He was pale, thin and his bright red hair was falling out. She'd been with him when it started coming out, and she told him about when it happened to her. She left out the part about it being on her wedding day. And that her husband shaved her head. And that her husband was his doctor. He didn't need to know all that.

Unfortunately it was all that she could think of as she stared off into space. The vision of Alex standing at the front of the church, looking amazing in his tuxedo, smiling bigger than she'd ever seen. There had been tears in her eyes, but they were happy tears. At that point she hadn't thought she'd make it into the next week. She had struggled down the aisle not sure her legs would keep moving, but they had. She had to get to him. And she did. And he spoke those words that she could still repeat by heart. And then he'd kissed her in the most beautiful passionate way.

Now he was taking her in, giving her a home, giving their son a home. How he had become that man from the boy he was when she first met him?

"Izzie?"

Her memories screeched to a halt as she heard Caleb call her name. "Hey, Caleb. I'm right here." She helped him put his glasses back on and sit up. "How are you feeling?"

"A little better. I don't have to throw up anymore."

She smiled at him, remembering what that was like. "Good. Do you want something to eat?"

"Not yet." He paused, looking at her oddly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why is your belly sticking out like that? It wasn't like that before."

Izzie couldn't help but laugh at his innocent curiosity. She looked down at her now-obvious bump. "Well, I'm having a baby. And he's growing in there."

"Cool! It's a boy?"

"Yep."

"When will he come out?"

"Hmmm... not for a while." She saw the disappointment in his eyes. "But hey, in a few more months, he'll be moving around so much, you might be able to feel him move from out here."

"He moves in there?"

"Yep. Right now only I can feel him, because he's still pretty tiny. But soon he'll get bigger and you'll be able to feel him kicking if you put your hand on my tummy."

"My mommy had a baby. I don't remember much about it, cause I was pretty little." A frown appeared on his face. "I miss her. And Alli. Alli was my sister."

Izzie was almost brought to tears by his sad eyes. She didn't want him to dwell on it, so she decided to do something to lift his spirits. She opened the drawer in the table next to his bed. "How about some 'Green Eggs and Ham."

Caleb's eyes lit up, as Izzie's favorite had quickly become his favorite, too. She couldn't count how many times she'd read it to him, but it was something special they could call their own.

She was midway through the story when she felt a presence in the doorway. She looked up to find Alex standing there. He had a very serious look on his face.

"Dr. Alex!"

"Hey kid. How are you feeling?"

"Better now. Izzie's reading to me, so that helps. Did you know she's having a baby?"

"Yep. I did know that," he said, showing very little emotion. There was something on his face that told her that something was very, very wrong.

"Everything okay, Alex?" She didn't want to alert Caleb to anything bad, but her curiosity was piqued.

"Everything's fine." He didn't look at her, which scared her. "Caleb, I've got to check your incision."

The boy quickly protested. "Awe. Do you have to?"

"Sorry, buddy. You had surgery three days ago. It's part of the deal. I've got to make sure you're healing properly." Izzie helped Caleb lay back so Alex could examine him. "Everything looks fine. Does anything hurt?" Caleb shook his head no. "All right. Your nurse is going to come redress it, okay?" He turned and walked out of the room.

She quickly stood and after making sure Caleb was okay, she followed after her ex-husband. She was able to slip into the elevator just as the doors were closing. "Alex. What's going on?" He was facing away from her and refused to turn around. She moved around to where he had to look at her. "Alex. Talk to me. Tell me what's wrong."

"You want to know what's wrong? What's wrong is that a good kid like Caleb is sick. He's sick and alone in a hospital. The kid has no life outside this hospital even if he does get better."

She was thoroughly confused by his outburst. "Alex, what are you talking about. Did you get Caleb's labs back? Is he getting sicker? Has the tumor spread?" She couldn't keep the fear out of her voice.

"No. I didn't get any labs back yet. But his mom ... she just..." he paused, fighting the waver in his voice.

"She what Alex?"

"She signed her rights over to the state." His voice was thick and tense. "Knowing that he was sick, possibly dying, she signed away her rights."

Shock registered on Izzie's eyes. "Oh my God! How could she do that? He's her baby."

"I don't know, Iz. I don't get it either. And now ... "

As he was talking the doors opened, revealing Derek on the other side. He stepped inside the elevator. "Karev. Good. I was looking for you." Alex looked at him hopefully. "I made those calls. We're in. I'll take care of all the paperwork."

"Already?"

The older man smiled. "Yep. Just got off the phone."

"Thank you," Alex said sincerely.

"You're welcome." The doors opened again and Derek exited.

Alex and Izzie followed behind, Izzie still confused as to what just happened. "'We're in'? What did he mean by that Alex?"

"He means that everything's okay now, Iz. Everything's okay."

* * *

Next chapter: _House hunting with Izzie and Alex._

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	18. Chapter 18

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 18**_

_Okay, another chapter for you all. This one was fun to write, so I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. And I have to say that the caliber of comments posted for the last chapter was awesome! I love to open my inbox and see what you are all thinking about this story. **Keep those reviews coming guys!** _

* * *

Rain drops hit the windshield in slow secession as Alex turned off the interstate and into a suburban area of Seattle. A sigh rang out from the seat next to him.

"We've seen six houses in two days, Alex. Nothing works for us. I'm tired and I'm hungry. Can't we do this tomorrow?"

"Iz, Helen says that this one just went on the market and that it's perfect for us. It also might be perfect for a ton of other people, too. So we've got to jump on it if we want to make an offer. It's within budget, in a nice neighborhood, in a great school district. We've got to look at it now."

Alex glanced over as Izzie pouted and curled up in the passenger seat. "It's raining and it's freezing outside." He wanted to point out that it wasn't that cold and that the rain had slowed to a drizzle, but he knew Izzie's limits. Her fuse was short even without pregnancy hormones, and he didn't want to be on the receiving end of one of her tirades. So he let it go.

The car remained silent until he turned the car into a neighborhood that they hadn't been to before. Her temperament changed immediately as she looked out the window. There was a park area in the center of the subdivision that looked clean and safe. The houses around it were well-kept and the lawns were manicured. It was all very family friendly. He caught a smile appearing on her face.

It grew even wider when he pulled into the driveway of a white siding and brick plantation style home. In fact, he had a hunch, judging by her expression that he'd be pulling into that driveway for a long, long time. Their realtor, a middle age woman named Helen was waiting for them.

As they exited the car, Alex took extra care in making sure that Izzie didn't slip on the wet cement. He stood close to her and she hooked her hand around his arm and they walked up the steps to the wide porch where the realtor stood.

"Hey, guys. You made it. I think you're going to love this one. In fact, there's a special feature in the house that I think will be perfect for you. Why don't we go on inside where it's warm."

She unlocked the door and allowed Izzie to enter first.

"There are brand new hardwood floors throughout the house, new tile work in the bathrooms and a backyard that is to die for. Four bedrooms, three and a half baths, 2,200 square feet."

Alex knew that Izzie was impressed. He looked around, and to be honest, so was he. The foyer opened into a great room that included a dining area, a living area and the kitchen. Large square columns dividing the rooms were both modern and classy. Walking ahead, Izzie was practically foaming at the mouth looking around the kitchen. Granite counter tops and stainless steel appliances, Helen was describing, and Alex knew that his ex-wife could see herself cooking here.

"This is amazing. All the appliances are brand new?" Izzie asked, in awe.

"The seller replaced them after they moved out. The cabinetry is mahogany."

"It's gorgeous."

"If you'll follow me, I'll show you the bedrooms." She moved through the living room, pointing out the built-in shelving, and Alex was quick to point out the spot for the flat screen television.

"This is the master bedroom. Plenty of space, big windows and a lot of natural light."

They looked around and followed Helen into the master bathroom and massive closet. "What do you think, Iz? Can all your clothes fit in here?"

She looked at him incredulously. "Alex, we talked about this. It's your house. You get the master."

"You'll need the closet space. And the bigger bathroom."

"Actually," Helen spoke up, "That's why I wanted you two to see this house. You've had this same argument in the last six houses, so I looked for something that would solve your problem. This house will. It essentially has a second master. The previous owners had a teenage daughter who insisted on having her own suite. So there is a second bedroom with a similar bathroom and huge walk-in closet just down this hallway. And it's on the same hallway with the guest rooms, one of which I sure would make a perfect nursery," she said, pointing to Izzie's growing stomach.

They followed her down a hallway and were pleased to find that the second suite was almost identical to the master, except for the soft yellow paint on the wall. Alex could tell that Izzie loved it. Her smile grew bigger than it had been all day. Next to it was a cute corner room, perfect for the nursery. They checked out the back yard and the fourth bedroom, and when their tour was over, Izzie's grin had grown even further. He was smiling too. This was their home, he had no doubt.

"Alex, it's perfect. It's exactly what we need."

He nodded and turned to Helen. "Let's make an offer."

"Fabulous! Let's go over to my office and see what needs to be done."

* * *

By the next day, Alex was on edge waiting to hear if the offer on the house had been accepted. Helen was due to call by 7 that night. Work had kept both him and Izzie distracted during the day, but since they'd gotten back to Meredith's, the tension was rising.

The house was quiet without Meredith and Derek chasing Georgia around. They had flown out earlier in the week to New York to visit Derek's family. Alex wasn't leaving Izzie alone for that amount of time, so he had moved into one of the other rooms. He quickly understood Meredith's issues with the size of their house. The place was like a cave if you were alone in it. A beautiful cave, but vast if you were by yourself. But with a vivacious little girl running around, it didn't ever seem vacant like it could.

"Did she call yet?" Izzie walked into the kitchen in a fluffy pink robe with a towel in her hands, drying her hair.

He didn't need to ask who she was talking about. Helen. "Not yet," he answered from his spot in front of the stove.

He could feel her watching him even with his back to her. "What are you doing?"

"It's dinner time. So I'm making dinner."

"You ... making dinner." She looked at him incredulously. "Did you change your mind about the baby and figured food poisoning was the best way to get rid of me?"

"Not funny, Iz. I can boil pasta, brown some hamburger meat and open a jar of sauce. You said earlier that you wanted spaghetti, so I'm making you some. Not to mention, I'm hungry, too." He felt her move up beside him, scrutinizing his work. She pulled a wooden spoon from the drawer and dipped it in the sauce and tasted it.

She nodded. "Not bad."

"Thank you."

She moved back away from the stove and sat on a stool at the island. "How was Caleb doing today? I went by and checked on him, but he was sound asleep the whole time."

"He's tired. The chemo's really taking it out of him."

"I know that feeling."

Alex sighed, not really wanting to break the news to her. "We got his new scans. I've got to go back in. There was some residual tumor we couldn't get to the last time and the chemo isn't working like the oncologist had thought it would. We're hoping to get it all in one more surgery, but if we can't ... " he shook his head, not really wanting to admit it out loud. "I just don't know how much more the kid's body can take. He just not responding to the treatments."

He put the plate of spaghetti in front of her, while she stared at him. He sat next to her and she continued to stare. Finally, she spoke softly. "They said I wasn't going to make it either, Alex. Remember. But Derek Shepard saved my life. He did the impossible. And I'm alive now."

"Because you responded well to the non-surgical treatment, Iz. Derek worked a miracle and the medicine allowed you to heal. If it hadn't worked, you probably wouldn't be here either. Caleb isn't taking well to the chemo."

"So what, you're just giving up?" she snapped.

"I'm being a realist. I'm being a surgeon. It's my job. Look, nobody wants Caleb to live more than I do. I have worked my ass off to keep him alive. You think I want to give up. But there's only so much I can do. The rest of it is up to his body."

She looked away and began to pick at her food. "I know. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you. I've gotten attached. I shouldn't have done that either."

"It's who you are, Iz. It wouldn't be you if you didn't get attached."

"Yeah, and it served me really well in the past," she rolled her eyes, bringing a smirk to his face.

"No comment." She smiled at him and their eyes met and for a split second Alex could imagine that they had gone back in time to the brief period where they were happy and together. "Now eat." he pointed to her uneaten spaghetti. "It's good."

She laughed and did as he commanded. Their conversation avoided anything deep for the rest of the meal, focusing on what they needed to start doing if they got the house. They finished off the food fairly quickly, and Alex sent Izzie into the living room to rest while he did the dishes. He was still worried about her overdoing it, even though Dr. Campbell assured them that their son was healthy and so was Izzie. But he couldn't help but want to protect her. He always had. With Denny's death, her cancer, losing George. He'd been right there.

He shook those thoughts from his head as he finished the dishes. He wiped his hands on a towel and headed toward the living room, wondering which horrible reality show he'd be forced to watch. Dancing celebrities? Crazy bachelorettes? Fashion designers? He shuddered at the thought.

As he turned the corner, he was unaware of his ex-wife walking in the opposite direction. By the time he'd figured it out, they had run right into each other and she was dangerously close to losing her balance.

He instantly put out his hands to steady her, which resulted in him wrapping his arms around and pulling her in close.

She was clearly startled by the close call, but her expression changed as she looked up at him. Hazel eyes met chocolate eyes as he felt the warmth of her hand on his chest spreading throughout his whole body. This was territory they'd been in before, but he didn't think they would ever see it again. And yet as they stood there, his eyes were suddenly drawn to her soft pink lips. And then...

* * *

_Ooohhhh ... what happens now? Things may be heating up!_ ;)

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	19. Chapter 19

**AGAIN**

_Chapter 19_

_Because of the fantastic response on the last chapter, I felt that a gift was necessary (not to mention that it was a tiny bit mean of me to end it where I did), sooooo ... I hope this very quick update will help! I'll even through in a warning that this chapter is a **little on the racy side**. Yeah, I thought you all might like that … Anyway, I definitely want to know what you think about this chapter! **So get your reviewing fingers ready!**_

* * *

He flung the door to her room open and instantly had her pinned against it. His aggressive advances did nothing but turn her on even more. The warmth of his kisses on her neck and his hands dipping into her robe were almost more than she could stand.

His mouth returned to hers as he reached for the tie of the pink terry cloth garment. She shivered in anticipation, and he paused backing away for a moment and looking into her eyes. "Iz, are you sure about this? If you want to stop ..."

"No." Her brown eyes begged for him to keep going. He moved back in, his lips capturing hers, their tongues battling for power. The robe fell to the floor and he lifted her up and carried her to the bed. She reached for his t shirt, pleased when he allowed her to pull it over his head and toss it to the floor. Moving her hands along his arms and chest and back, she smiled as she found that she remembered every chiseled muscle, every spot that made him moan. Some things she couldn't forget.

He began his journey down her body and it became clear that she was not the only one who remembered things. He still remembered the ticklish spot just under her ribcage. And when he nibbled on the flesh around her butterfly tattoo, she was unable to stop herself from crying out his name. Nothing had changed.

His fingers were feather light against her thighs as his lips moved further and further south. She groaned in anticipation as he pressed light kisses on her swollen belly. While she appreciated the sentimental moment, she needed more. Her body writhed underneath him, urging him further. She was grateful when he finally got the clue and moved lower. She closed her eyes waiting for the pleasure to wash over her.

"Izzie?"

She wasn't sure why he was whispering. That wasn't what his tongue needed to be doing at that moment.

"Izzie." His voice was louder now. A fog filled in around her as she opened her eyes. It wasn't night anymore and she was alone in her bed. She looked around to find Alex standing in the doorway to Meredith's guestroom.

"What?" she asked, sleep filling her voice. She struggled to sit up as he moved into the room.

"Your alarm clock has been going off for twenty minutes. Do you need more sleep? You look flushed?" The concern was apparent on his face.

"Oh, no. I'm fine," she answered quickly. "I just didn't sleep very well. Did you get the stuff moved out of your place?"

He moved a little further into the room, nodding. "With Derek and Owen helping it didn't really take very long. Not like I had much crap anyway. The furniture store is delivering the new stuff to the house around noon. But I can take care of that if you'd rather stay here and sleep."

"You think I'm letting you decorate the house without me?" she raised an eyebrow at the ludicrous notion. "Yeah, not happening. Get out of here so I can get ready."

"Hey, I think I could handle it with all of those home decorating shows you make me watch."

She pointed toward the door, smile on her face. "Out!"

As soon as he did as she ordered, she flopped back down on the bed, pulling her pillow over her face. This had to stop. She couldn't keep having that same dream over and over. She'd tried everything to keep her mind off what would have happened three weeks before when she thought he might kiss her.

Of course their realtor had impeccable timing and and her phone call put a stop to it before it got started. Surprisingly, even with the intensity of that moment, no awkwardness had ensued, and they had fallen right back into the routine of their friendship. Izzie couldn't help but be a little sad that nothing had come of it.

But at least they had gotten the house.

It was moving day. Throwing on some sweat pants and an oversized t shirt, Izzie pulled her hair into a ponytail and headed into the kitchen. Meredith, Derek, Cristina, Owen and Alex were seated around the table drinking coffee, while Georgia lay sprawled out on the floor, crayons in hand.

She smiled as she saw Cristina leaning against Owen, an almost pleasant look on her usually hard face. Izzie had witnessed their reunion first hand, as the two women had been eating lunch outside the hospital the day he came back. She remembered seeing the man from a distance, knowing he looked familiar. Cristina had seen him too and had instantly gone silent. As he had moved closer, she had gotten up and started walking toward him. It was then that Izzie realized who it was. Soon they were both running toward each other and when they met, he had lifted her up in his arms and spun her around. It was a reunion right out of a chick flick, a fact that she reminded Cristina of every chance she got. Cristina hated it.

"Hey guys. Sorry I'm running late." She patted her belly. "I'm just going to blame it on the fact that someone spent the night playing soccer with my internal organs." She knew it wasn't exactly the truth, but everyone accepted it.

The men stood up from the table, ready to get to work.

"What needs to go in the truck?" Derek asked.

"There are the five or six boxes in the guestroom and my suitcase. The rest of the stuff is in storage. So we can go get that next."

Owen took charge. "All right men, you heard the pregnant lady. Let's get moving."

* * *

"So, how are things between you and Owen now that he's back for good?" Meredith teased her best friend, looking up from the box of books she was unpacking.

Cristina glared at her, but couldn't suppress the cat-like grin on her face. "The sex is great."

Izzie rolled her eyes and focused on the box of pictures she was working on. Sex was the last thing she needed to hear about. But of course the other two women wouldn't let it go.

"That wasn't what I asked," Meredith paused. "But ... how good? Burn your ass on the vent good?" Both of them cracked up at this, and it was apparent to Izzie that this was one of the many inside jokes she had missed while she was in Chehalis. She sighed as she started dusting off the old frames.

"Better than that." Cristina began placing the books on the bookshelf in the living room. "I hadn't had sex in over a year. It was hot, it was sweaty. It was, by far, the most amazing sex I've ever had in my life. In fact, it was like the best sex I've ever had, but doubled."

Izzie couldn't take it anymore. A groan spilled from her lips and Meredith and Cristina looked up at her.

"You okay, Iz?"

"Yes, Mer, I'm fine. But could we please not talk about Cristina's mind-blowing sex anymore. I can't take it." The mystified looks on her friends' faces made her roll her eyes again. "It's been a while."

"How long?" Meredith elbowed Cristina when she asked, but it was obvious they were both curious.

Izzie let out an embarrassed chuckle."A long while. There were a few men I went out with in Chehalis, but it never got to that point. None of them ever really stuck around long enough to get to the bedroom, and the ones that did, well, I just wasn't interested."

"Wait, are you saying that you haven't had sex since you left Seattle?!" Cristina's eyes went wide.

"The night before I got fired. At the trailer. Since then ... I don't know. I wasn't ready."

"Oh my God! Are you serious?!"

"Cristina, be nice," Meredith chided.

"Admit it, you're shocked."

She looked over at Izzie. "A little bit."

"It's okay. I'm really fine with it. But with the pregnancy hormones and everything, it seems to be the only thing that I can think about. I can't go to sleep because all I dream about is sex and then I wake up exhausted in the morning. I'm hopeless."

"End of the second trimester, early third." Meredith nodded knowingly. "I remember it well. Very well."

"Yes, but at least you had Derek around to help you out. I'm not so lucky. And I certainly don't anticipate meeting anyone who would be interested in having sex with a big, fat, ugly cow like I am right now. Nope, no sex in my immediate future."

"You're not fat or ugly, Iz. You're pregnant." Meredith reminded her.

"Uh, hello." Cristina rolled her eyes. "You're moving into a house with Alex. As far as I know he hasn't been with anyone since you came back. I'm sure he'd be willing to help you with that."

"He's my ex-husband, Cristina. We can't ... He doesn't want to go back there and I can't blame him after what happened last time. I have no right to expected it of him." She looked down at the frame she had just picked up from the bottom of the box. In it, she was in a gorgeous white gown, and he was in his tux. They were looking at each other, completely in love and oblivious to the camera. It was their wedding picture. "We're just friends."

"Friends who were married and friends who are having a baby together. Nothing about your relationship is normal. Why should this be any different? I mean, it's not like you two haven't had sex before. And if I'm not mistaken, the sex last time was pretty damn good, judging by the number of times you two would sneak off to the supply closets."

"And the noise you made when you were both living at the old house. I was kind of jealous. Annoyed, but jealous," Meredith added in.

"You were listening to us!?"

"Kind of difficult not to, Iz. You were ... enthusiastic."Izzie looked at Meredith, mouth gaping open, not exactly sure how to respond to that. Fortunately for her, Georgia chose that moment to run from the hallway into the living room. "Mommy! Daddy dropped a hammer on his finger and saids a bad word!"

"What'd he say, rugrat?" Cristina asked as Meredith and Izzie glared at her.

"Don't answer Aunt Cristina, Georgia. I'll come see what is wrong with daddy." Mother and daughter headed down the hall, leaving Izzie alone with Cristina.

"So back to your sex life, or extreme lack thereof --"

"Cristina, don't."

"I'm just saying that you should just walk up to him and explain the situation and just go for it. Good sex is good sex. It doesn't have to mean anything." She paused looking down at the empty box in her hands. "I'm going to take this out to the garbage."

As soon as she disappeared out to the garage to toss the box, Izzie picked up the wedding picture again. Tears filled her eyes as she thought about Cristina's words. "It doesn't have to mean anything." They echoed in her mind as she hugged the photo against her chest. It was true that it didn't _have _to mean anything. But Izzie knew that being with him again _would_ mean something. It would mean something to her. She had been working so hard to suppress her feelings since she realized that she still loved him and it wasn't getting any easier. In fact, she knew that living with him would probably make it downright unbearable.

And the thought of having sex with the man she loved, knowing that he didn't love her, wouldn't let himself love her, would be the hardest part of all.

Sighing, she placed the picture into a box she would put in the bottom of her closet, where she was certain it would remain.

* * *

_Baby Shower is next!_

_**And you all thought I was mean when I ended the last chapter. You probably all hate me after the dream sequence. But I hope you'll review anyway and keep reading! Keep all of the fabulous REVIEWS coming!  
**_


	20. Chapter 20

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 20**_

_You guys have blown me away with the amazing comments. I am really shocked that you are all loving this as much as I loved writing it. To answer a few questions from the comments, there will be 24 chapters and an epilogue. So not much more to go. I have yet to decide what my next project will be, but I want to get this one out before I start thinking about that. Anyway, on with the chapter. **Please review and let me know what you all think!!!**_

* * *

The morning of her baby shower brunch was an unusually sunny day for Seattle. Bailey and Teddy had graciously taken charge of it from Meredith and it had turned out beautifully. As Izzie and Meredith entered the little restaurant, they were escorted to a room with wall to wall windows that overlooked all of the action on the bay. Fresh bouquets of blue flowers decorated the long tables, which were draped in white linens.

"Oh! You guys! It's beautiful! Thank you so much for doing this!" she hugged Bailey and Teddy as well as she could around her belly.

"No kidding," Meredith added. "Anything I would have planned would have looked like crap compared to what you two have done. This is amazing."

The other guests soon arrived and the room was buzzing with excitement. Eventually Bailey settled everyone down enough so that Izzie could begin opening the mountain of gifts that was piled onto a separate table at the far end of the room.

The first gift was from Arizona. As Izzie took the top off the box, a gasp fell from her lips. She put a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing. Looking up at the pediatric surgeon, she smiled. "Where on earth did you find it?!" She pulled out a set of miniature navy blue scrubs, and a lab coat with "Daddy's little helper" embroidered on the pocket. A miniature stethoscope completed the look.

The room filled with doctors squealed with delight.

"That's my little secret."

"Alex is going to love it! So cute."

"I thought he might like it. He really is excited about the baby, Izzie. You should see him at work. He tries to maintain this macho, tough guy exterior, but all someone has to do is ask him if he has kids and he's pulling out the ultrasound photos. It's really sweet. And he's so great with the kids in the wing."

"I just want to point out that I was the one who gave him a push in the right direction." Bailey spoke up. "Anyone who is blind would know that the man is great with kids. But I saw him sitting in that NICU with that preemie for an entire night. That's when I knew he was made for pedes."

"He stayed with a preemie all night?" Izzie hadn't heard this story.

"Oh, right the calendar shoot. Mark told me about that." Callie giggled as she sat down next to Arizona.

Izzie looked confused "What on earth are you all talking about."

Bailey looked at Izzie. "It was right after you left. He and Arizona were working on a preemie who wasn't going to make it through the night. The child's mother, who, I think, had to have brain surgery, was afraid that her daughter would die without ever being held. Well, Alex couldn't have that. I caught him holding the tiny little thing like he was her only thread to life. What he didn't notice was that her stats were going up."

"Kangaroo?" Izzie asked.

"Yep, so I told him to take his shirt off, because the skin-on-skin contact was more likely to help. Took some convincing, but he finally did."

Callie giggled again. "That must have been when Mark walked in."

"Derek, too. He told me about it later. I think they gave him a really hard time," Meredith added in.

"They did." Bailey confirmed. "But he didn't let it get to him. He stayed with that child all night. That's when I told him. Pedes was where he belonged."

"Bailey was right." Arizona smiled, clearly proud of the doctor that Alex had become. "The kids love him. The parents think he's fantastic. Especially the single mothers. I think he's gotten more phone numbers at work than he has at Joes. I guess it's like hero worship or whatever, but here's this handsome man saving their kids' life? They're all over him."

Teddy sipped her drink, nodding in agreement. "I actually had one of the cardiac cases where the mother wanted Dr. Karev to come and give her all of the post op information. Forget the fact that I was the lead surgeon on the case. Woman was on a mission."

All the women laughed briefly until they remembered that Izzie used to be married to him. They turned and looked at her, gauging her reaction. She forced a smile to her face. "It's fine guys. He's a single man. I have no claim on his social life at all. He's free to date any and all of the single mothers on the pedes floor if he wants to. I'm just the woman who is having his baby. Really. I'm fine. What's the next gift?"

Meredith looked around, bending to pick up a gift. "Um ... this one's from Cristina ...."

The gifts continued until they were all unwrapped. After the food was served and the cake was cut, Izzie excused herself to the bathroom. Placing her hand on her swollen belly, she fought to keep the tears from flowing until she reached the restroom.

As she pushed the door open, she was relieved to find a padded bench where she could sit down. She worked her way down to a sitting position and then let the tears flow. She knew her mascara was running by the spot that appeared on her skirt. She chided herself for letting her emotions get the better of her. Realizing she still had feelings for Alex had been hard enough. But living with it everyday, living with him everyday, and knowing that he didn't love her back was almost too painful to bear.

She froze when she heard the door open.

"Iz, you okay?" Meredith sat beside her and placed a hand on her friends back.

"I'm fine, Mer," she lied.

"If you were okay, you wouldn't be in here crying your eyes out."

"I might be. Hormones and all."

"Yeah, but that's not all it is, is it? You got upset when we started talking about Alex. Is this about him?"

Izzie finally looked up at Meredith. "Yes. No. I don't know. I know that I don't have any claim on him. He's free to go out with whoever. I shouldn't, I can't let it bother me."

The glimmer in Meredith's eyes went unnoticed by Izzie. "But it does bother you, doesn't it?"

She looked at the shorter woman, shocked and not covering it well. "I ... Meredith, I don't ..." she stuttered.

"You still love him."

Izzie knew that she was caught. She couldn't hide it from Meredith. "Please don't say anything, Mer. I don't want to ruin what we've got now. It's comfortable. It's good. It's what he wants. He doesn't love me anymore and I can't force him to. If all I ever get from him is his friendship and this child, then I'm getting more than I deserve. Please don't tell him," she begged.

Meredith took Izzie's hand in her's."You should tell him, Iz."

"I can't," she sighed, leaning back against the wall. "I have no right. I lost my chance years ago. I'd probably screw it up again anyway. You can't say anything."

Meredith's eyes looked sad, but her sincerity shone through when she promised, "I won't say anything."

"Thank you."

* * *

After a long Saturday at work, all Alex could think about was a shower and food. He hadn't seen Izzie all day, because he had left while she was still sleeping. He wasn't avoiding her, but for the last few months, he felt like he had been fighting a losing battle with himself, and it was something he was unaccustomed to. There had been a moment between them. A moment where he wanted to lean in and kiss her, to feel that rush of whatever it was that they used to have together. But as the phone had rung and brought them back to reality, he knew he had to avoid anything more than friendship with his ex-wife.

From down the hall, he could tell that the light in the nursery was on.

"Iz?"

"Hey." She was seated on the floor surrounded by the boxes and bags of baby clothes they'd been given. She turned around and looked up at him, smile gracing her face.

"Oh my God, how much baby crap did we get?"

"A lot. He's going to be the best dressed boy in Seattle. And Callie went on rubber ducky overload. Look at the mobile she bought for the crib."

Alex looked a the toy she was holding. Four plastic yellow ducks were spinning around a blue ring. It matched the rest of the room perfectly. After a month of arguing back and forth, They had finally settled on the ducks because they weren't too girly in his eyes and they were really cute in her's. "That's pretty cool, actually."

"Oh! ..." She began to pick through the gifts, clearly looking for something specific. She stood up when she found it. "Here. You've got to see what Arizona got for him."

Alex smiled when he opened the box and saw a miniature set of scrubs and a lab coat. "'Daddy's little helper' ... I like that," he laughed.

She smiled back at him with an expression that he couldn't quite read. Whatever it was, it was a good look for her. She stepped away toward the closet to hang up the scrubs, and he got the first real chance to look a her. She was still all dressed up from the shower. The peach colored silky sundress hugged her growing figure in all the right places. She looked amazing. Maybe more beautiful than she had on their wedding day. Then she had been pale and sickly. Now she literally glowed. He finally understood that saying.

Holding back a groan, he forced himself to turn away. Looking at her like that ... he couldn't do it. It made things too difficult. He had to focus on the baby and protect his heart. He couldn't take the chance again. Suddenly he heard her voice again.

"What?"

"I said I think I'm going to go lay down for a little while. I'm exhausted. Do you mind if we look through the rest of it later?"

"No, that's fine." She disappeared around the corner, and he shook his head. He sat down in the rocking chair and looked around the room, fighting the confusion in his mind with thoughts of meeting his son.

* * *

_Next Chapter: Fun with Baby Names …_

**You guys know the drill …. REVIEWS PLEASE!**


	21. Chapter 21

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 21**_

_You guys are spoiling me with all of the comments! I am so thrilled with the responses I am getting chapter after chapter. It's really great! Not much to say here, but just know that we're in the home stretch for this story. But I have to say that these last few chapters are some of my favorite I've ever written, so I hope you'll enjoy them too! **Oh yeah, more reviews would totally rock my world!**_

_Side note: I'm so not judging anyone's choice of baby names, I just think some celebrities are out of control._

* * *

"Davis, Luke, Brody ... Brody." A smile crossed Izzie's face as she scribbled the name down in the notebook in her lap. Seated in her favorite spot on the couch, laptop beside her, she had spent the last three hours scanning the internet for baby names. She had a list of about 40 names, 95% of which she was sure that Alex would hate. The sound of the garage door opening pulled her eyes from the computer.

"Alex? That you?"

"Yeah." he mumbled. A few seconds later he appeared in the living room and immediately slumped down next to her feet at the end of the sofa.

"Everything okay?" She could tell by the tired expression and the darkness in his eyes that everything was not, in fact, okay.

"Caleb's lab work ups came back. Surgery didn't work and the chemo still isn't working fast enough. Now he needs some kind of miracle."

"Oh, God." Tears began to well in her eyes, thinking about the little boy who had captured her heart in a few short months. She moved the laptop to the coffee table and scooted herself closer to him. Placing one hand on his bicep and the other around his shoulders, she held him as a few tears streaked down his face. She knew that nothing she said in that moment would be heard.

They sat lost in their sadness for a while. She began rubbing small circles on his back. She remembered that it was sometimes the only way to relax him. She eventually felt some of the tension dissipate from his body, so she decided to change the subject entirely. He needed to think about something else, if only for a little while. "I've been looking at baby names. We're running out of time."

He looked relieved at the distraction. "We've got a month and a half, Iz."

"Do you want to be arguing about it in the delivery room?"

"No."

"Then we need to work on this now."

"Fine, let's see what you got." He picked up the laptop from the table and began to scan the current page. His eyebrows raised and he looked over at his ex-wife. "Please tell me that you aren't seriously considering any of these names."

"It's celebrity baby names. I'm just thinking that we might want something unique."

"Atlas ... Banjo ... Petal Blossom! Who the hell names their kid Petal Blossom?"

"Okay, those are pretty bad. But look, Davis is nice. And Luke. Brody."

"Still wouldn't name my kid any of those names." He continued to scan the list. "What are these? Phoenix ... Boston ... Bronx ... London ... Ireland. Babies named for the location of conception? What would our kid be? Petrie dish?"

Izzie let out a snort of laughter at his baby name commentary. "Yes, that's exactly what I want to name our baby. Petrie Dish Stevens Karev. What do you think? It has a ring to it."

"You are out of your mind, woman. Look these kids have built in careers: Pilot and Poet. So I guess if the kids decide to be doctors or lawyers or the President, their parents would be disappointed." Her giggle became a full on laugh as he continued to mock the names on the list. "Apple, Denim, Sunday ... Days of the week? Seriously?!"

"I actually don't mind Sunday. I think it's a cute name for a little girl."

He glanced up at her and saw her serious expression. "Or for an ice cream dessert," he said, returning to the screen. "David Bowie named his kid Zowie Bowie. That's like built-in future resentment right there. God, some of the middle names are worse than the first. Speck Wildhorse? Diva Muffin ... don't even think about it, Iz."

"What?!" she said innocently. "I wasn't thinking anything of the sort."

"Can you just find me a list of normal names. These celebrities are out of their minds."

"No."

"No?"

"No. I've kind of got my heart set on Petrie Dish now. You may have to fight me on that."

"Oh is that so?" Before she saw it coming, he had shifted her to where her feet were in his lap and he began to tickle them.

"Argh! Alex, stop it. That tickles, please!" He just smirked at her, as her belly prevented her from defending herself. "You know how ticklish I am." She couldn't speak any longer and dissolved completely into fits of laughter, until he finally grew tired of her attempts to kick him.

He leaned over her, in between her belly and the back of the couch. "Admit defeat?"

"Fine. We won't name our baby Petrie. But until you find a name you like, I reserve the right to call him that." She smiled up at him with a determined grin.

"As long as it doesn't go on the birth certificate." She watched him carefully as his playful eyes morphed into something more serious. He was transfixed on her bulging belly, revealed to him as her camisole had ridden up during his little attack. A softer smile enveloped his face as a bump that could have been a fist or a foot appeared. He reached his hand out and touched her where the imprint remained, and she struggled to keep her breathing under control. She had no idea if he felt the same electricity coursing through him as she did. Their eyes met and she swallowed not really able to breathe.

He suddenly broke the connection and stood and left the room mumbling something about food. Her heart broke a little bit more inside her chest.

* * *

He wasn't hungry at all. Not for food anyway. It had been some lame excuse to get himself out of there. Being that close to her yet again, touching her like that was almost too much to bear. He could have easily leaned down and kissed her. Then he would have been powerless in his attempts to keep his heart from getting involved again.

Living together had proved to be more difficult than he had expected. He found himself glancing in her direction at the breakfast table, staring at her when she was baking, unable to look away when she was doing something mundane like laundry. But he fought it. He made the baby his priority and told himself that nothing more was acceptable. She was his friend. Nothing more.

When his hand was caressing her stomach, it was as if a thousand lightening bolts had hit him. He could still feel the tingling as he aimlessly searched through the pantry. His mind was focused on the deep brown pools of her eyes. What was it he had seen in them? Hope? Joy? Sadness? Confusion? Years ago, he would have been able to pinpoint the emotion. But now he wasn't sure of anything.

Except that the electricity in his hand was still present and he couldn't get his ex-wife off his mind.

* * *

_I hate to do this, but I'm not giving you all a teaser this time. But I PROMISE I'll get the next chapter out this weekend! Maybe sooner depending on the reviews. ;)_


	22. Chapter 22

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 22**_

_First of all, an apology. This is easily the shortest chapter in the story, but I felt it had to stand alone. I didn't want to add to it just for the sake of making it longer. So I made the choice to leave it as is. Hope you all are okay with that. The next chapter is definitely much longer. **But just because this is a short one doesn't mean that I don't want your reviews. Because I really, really do want to know what you think about it. So please review!**_

_P.S. I'm just going to go ahead and throw up a** tissue warning** from the get go. I needed quite a few when I was writing this one._

* * *

"Izzie?" he called weakly.

She looked over at the pale, emaciated child on the bed. Working around her protrding belly, she scooted her chair closer to the bed. She leaned in close, and put a hand to the little boy's cheek. "I'm right here, Caleb."

"And Dr. Alex?"

"I'm here too, buddy," Alex said as he walked back into the room and moved to the opposite side of the bed from Izzie.

The boy slowly opened his blue eyes. The sounds of the gradually slowing heart monitor grated on Izzie's ears as she listened for his whisper. "Will you stay with me?"

"We're not going anywhere, sweetie." She looked to Alex as he watched the monitors, taking a moment to silence them. He turned back to her, out of Caleb's line of sight, and shook his head solemnly. She sighed, knowing that the little boy's time was short. "I'll stay right here."

He closed his eyes and then opened them again, fighting for breath. "What's it going to be like? Will it hurt?" There was no question to either adult in the room what the "it" was. Caleb knew what was happening to him. He had fought it so long and his body just couldn't push any further. Alex had realized this the night before and neither he nor Izzie had left the child's bedside for any significant amount of time since then.

Desperately trying to keep her composure, Izzie spoke softly. "It won't hurt. I promise. It'll be like ... like riding an elevator."

Caleb nodded, eyes closed again. "I like elevators."

"And when the doors open, someone you know who is already there will be waiting for you."

He struggled to open his eyes again. "But ... I don't know anyone who's died. Does that mean I'll be alone?" Tears welled up and spilled over onto his face.

"No. No," she quickly corrected. She wiped the tears off of his face. "You won't be alone. I'll bet my best friend will even be there waiting on you. His name was George O'Malley. He was a doctor, too, so he'll take good care of you. Will you look for him?"

She smiled when Caleb nodded. His breathing had slowed and was coming in short pants. Izzie took his hand, chin quivering as the child began to let go. "I'm so sleepy. Tell me the story."

"It's okay, Caleb. You can sleep now," she whispered in his ear, her voice wavering. _"I will not eat them in a house. _

_I will not eat them with a mouse. _

_Not with a fox or in a box. _

_I do not like green eggs and ham. _

_I do not like them Sam I am. ....."_

Alex turned away to watch the monitors, not wanting to see the boy he had worked so feverishly to save, die. He'd seen so many children die over the years, but it never got easier. And Caleb was a special kid. Eventually the pants of breath stopped and the monitor showed only a flat line. Alex had to work to swallow the lump in his throat as he heard Izzie's sniffles behind him. He waited a few moments and marked down the time of death on the chart. Turning off the machines completely, he turned back to face his ex-wife.

She was wiping her face, trying not to sob, but losing the battle rapidly. Alex put the chart in the slot at the end of the bed and moved to Izzie, wrapping his arms around her. He gently stood her up and walked her out of the room. Her sobs grew louder as he led her to the stairwell. He sat her down on the bottom step and pulled her close.

"He was just a child, Alex!" She cried into his chest. He rubbed her back as her tears bled into his scrub top. "His mother didn't even come to say goodbye. He never saw his sister. He was all alone. It's not fair!"

"Shhh, Iz," he whispered in her ear. "He wasn't alone. You didn't leave him alone. He died knowing someone cared about him. You made sure of that." He felt the moisture on his own face as he pressed a soft kiss to Izzie's temple. They sat like that for a while, holding onto each other like their lives depended on it. Some how over the course of time, Alex's hand had made its way to Izzie's stomach. Her sobs were giving way, when the baby kicked at the pressure of his father's hand.

"Caleb."

Izzie sat up and looked at Alex, her face puffy and red. "What about him?"

"No, the baby. He still doesn't have a name. I think we should name him Caleb."

Izzie's tears had stopped, but the tell-tale water streaks remained on her face. She wiped at her cheeks as she thought about what Alex had said. A smile slowly spread across her face. "Caleb Alexander Stevens Karev. I like it. I think Caleb would have liked it, too."

* * *

So, yeah. I killed Caleb. The fact is he was never going to survive but it still broke my heart to write. it. Please forgive me!

_**Next Chapter is a big one:** _

_"Hey, Alex," He raised his eyebrows in response. "We're having a son today."_

_He sent a smile her direction. "Yeah. We are."_

**REVIEW, PLEASE!!!**


	23. Chapter 23

**AGAIN**

_**Chapter 23**_

_It's time to meet the baby! How will they handle childbirth? Will Alex panic? Will either Alex or Izzie profess their love for one another? Will they FINALLY get back together? Hmmm …. I'm not sure. But what I am sure of is that there is only one more chapter and an epilogue after this chapter. I am also sure that I LOVE reviews and even though we're nearing the end of the story, I still want to know what you all think! **So please, please keep those reviews coming.**_

* * *

It was early on a Sunday morning. Alex was standing in the kitchen scarfing down his marshmallow cereal. It was still dark out, and birds were just beginning to chirp. He looked out the window to see the clouds rolling in again. Another rainy day in Seattle, he thought to himself.

"Alex?"

He turned around at Izzie's voice behind him, surprised to see her awake so early on a day she could sleep in. "What are you doing up?"

"I need to ride to the hospital with you."

"Iz, it's Sunday. You're off, you know that."

"Yes, I know," she rolled her eyes at him. "But I also know that when a woman's water breaks it's time to go to the hospital. Mine broke twenty minutes ago."

His felt his eyes grow large as he tossed his bowl into the sink, still full of cereal. "What do you mean twenty minutes ago! You should have told me twenty minutes ago. Why did you wait so long?"

"Because my leg was covered in amniotic fluid and I wanted to rinse off in the shower. I'm barely having contractions. We have plenty of time."

"But your water broke!"

She walked over to him, and placed her hands on his shoulders and spoke to him very slowly. "Alex. Look at me. I've had seven contractions over the last five hours. My water only just now broke and I am, in no way, ready to push this baby out. We've got lots of time. You know this! How long have you been a doctor again?"

Alex knew that Izzie was right. There was no need to panic. This was a perfectly normal scenario, but he now understood those father's who freaked out when it was time to go to the hospital. His heart was racing and the reality was setting in.

"Can you get the bag out of the nursery. I've got to go grab a few more things. I just wanted to make sure you didn't leave without me."

"Yeah."

She move to go back to her room, but paused and turned back to him. "Hey, Alex," He raised his eyebrows in response. "We're having a son today."

He sent a smile her direction. "Yeah. We are."

* * *

Meredith and Cristina were standing on the bridge drinking coffee after a long night of cases. Just a few more hours and then they were done for the day. Neither one could wait.

"What on earth?" Cristina's words brought Meredith out of an exhaustion-induced daze. She looked to the first floor below to where her best friend was staring. Just inside the door Alex was helping Izzie inside, with her purse and an overnight bag thrown over his shoulder. Meredith looked over at Cristina and they rushed down the stairs.

When they got there, Izzie was sitting on one of the uncomfortable chairs.

"Izzie. What are you doing here? Are you in labor?" Meredith asked as they approached their friend.

"My water broke."

"You're two weeks early," Cristina pointed out.

"But I'm fine and the baby's fine. He's kicking like crazy. My contractions are about a half hour apart, so nothing's going to happen anytime soon. Alex, on the other hand, is freaking out a little bit." As if on cue, Alex rushed around the corner with a wheelchair. "See what I mean?"

He looked over at his two co-workers and paused to catch his breath. "Good, you guys are here. I need to get Izzie up to Labor and Delivery. Can you make sure my cases are covered and that Shepard knows that I won't be working for the next few days."

Izzie giggled. "Alex. You're freaking out for no reason. You really didn't need to get the wheel chair. I could have walked up to L&D."

"Nope, I agree with Alex on this one." Cristina ignored the looks the others gave her. "It's hopsital policy. Now get your ass in the wheelchair."

* * *

Four hours later, Alex was beginning to get on Izzie's nerves.

"Would you please stop with the hovering?!" She knew that yelling at him wasn't going to help, but her contractions were getting stronger and he wouldn't stop asking her how she was feeling every three minutes.

"Sorry," he sounded just as on-edge as she felt. "I'm sorry, Iz."

Guilt gnawed at her. "No I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled. I just want this to be as peaceful as possible and you being nervous freaks me out a little bit. So do you think, maybe, you relax just a tiny bit? If you're calm then I'll be calm and this will be much easier for both of us. Please?"

She watched as his eyes softened and he took a deep breath. "Yeah. Okay. Sorry. I've seen this so many times but it's different now, you know. We're having a baby." A smile appeared on his face. "I'll tone it down a couple of notches. I promise." He took her hand an squeezed it reassuringly.

"Thank you." Another contraction began to grip her again. She clung to his hand, her grasp unconsciously tightening. He leaned over her and whispered softly in her ear as the rode out the pain. When it was over, she looked up at him. "Will you do something for me?"

He nodded.

"Go and use your attending superpowers to light a fire under that anesthesiologist's ass. I need those drugs!"

* * *

"All right, Izzie. You're at 10 centimeters. In the next few contractions you're going to start pushing, okay?"

She nodded, sweat beading on her forehead. She was bound and determined she wasn't going to be one of those crazy women who screamed like a raving lunatic during childbirth. She did that with Hannah. The old Izzie would have done that. She looked up at Alex, pleased to see that he had calmed down significantly. He was ready for this and she was thankful to have him here beside her.

"Are you going to hit me if I ask how you're feeling?" He wiped her face with a wet cloth and then took her hand in his.

She shook her head and grinned at him. "Not this time. I'm fine. I just want him here."

He nodded in agreement, watching the monitor begin to spike up for a contraction. "Get ready, Iz." He whispered quietly as Dr. Campbell instructed her to push. He counted to ten, rubbing her back as she began the final stage of her pregnancy.

She squeezed her eyes shut, focusing on the thought of meeting her son soon.

After about twenty five minutes, Dr. Campbell looked up with a smile from her position at the foot of the bed. "I see his head. You're doing great, Izzie." The OB's gaze moved over to Alex. "Want a look, dad?"

Alex looked down at Izzie for approval. "Go ahead. He's your son, too. Besides, nothing you haven't seen, right?" Just then another contraction hit and he remained by her side until it was over. He moved next to Dr. Campbell for a brief moment to get his first look at his son.

"He's got hair, Iz. A lot of light brown hair." He was struggling to remain composed, she could tell, as a tear ran down her own face. He walked back up next to her as the next contraction came and they both knew it wouldn't be much longer.

The next three contractions came quickly and with a final groan from Izzie, their baby, their son entered the world with a loud wail. Laughter spilled out of Izzie's mouth and tears fell from her eyes as she watched Dr. Campbell dry the baby off. The OB then immediately placed him on his mother's chest.

Izzie was so over powered with emotions that she couldn't speak. She just soaked in the feeling of holding her son and hearing him cry. She looked up at Alex again to find unshed tears filling his hazel eyes. He had one arm around her and the other was holding his son's hand. The tiny hand gripped his finger. He pressed a kiss to her forehead as their son continued to scream.

"Alex." Dr. Campbell interrupted. "Want to cut the cord?"

"Yeah." He moved down to the foot of the bed as a nurse took the baby from Izzie. As she watched him cut the cord, she couldn't help but think how amazing it was that he was the father of her child. After everything, this baby made it all worth it.

* * *

"He's perfect."

"Like father like son."

She giggled and rolled her eyes at him. "Some things never really change, do they? Hopefully he won't be arrogant like his father." She looked down at the tiny face placing a finger on his nose that mirrored hers. "You won't be like that, will you? He has your lips though. And your chin."

Alex picked his son up from his mother's lap and examined his face carefully. "Your nose, your eyes and your ears. Girls will be all over him in 16 years."

Izzie gasped at his comment."Take that back. He's only three hours old, Alex. Don't rush it!"

"True, but he's already charmed all the nurses in the nursery." He lifted the child against his chest and walked him around the room. A knock sounded at the door.

"Come in," Izzie called.

Meredith, Arizona and Teddy walked in followed by Callie, Owen, Derek, who was holding Georgia's hand, Bailey and then finally Cristina."Oh, let me see this little man." Teddy exclaimed. Alex shifted the baby to where they could all see him. Oohs and ahhs were heard as they all looked at the newest member of the clan.

"You're going to be a handsome little fella, aren't you?" Arizona said as she took the boy from her protege's arms. Knowing it would be a while before he got to hold his son again, he let the women do their thing and moved over to where Owen and Derek were standing. The women, even Cristina, crowded near Izzie's bed, cooing over the newborn, while Georgia jumped up and down for a closer look. Callie lifted the girl up on her hip so that she could see her new cousin. Georgia gently touched his cheek and giggled when he opened his eyes to look at her. For her part, Izzie looked positively radiant.

"You made the right choice, Karev." Derek said, as he patted his friend on the back. Owen chuckled in agreement.

Unable to wipe the smile from his face, he nodded. "Yeah. I know I did."

* * *

**Next (and FINAL! ) chapter:** _Crawling out of bed, he rubbed his eyes as he moved toward the nursery. What he found there was nothing unusual or out of the ordinary. But the slivery moon creeping in through the edge of the blinds mixed with the soft golden glow of the rubber ducky night light outlining his ex-wife and his child pulled at his heart. _

**REVIEWS PLEASE!!!**


	24. Chapter 24

**AGAIN**

**Chapter 24**

_So here we are … the final chapter. I'm a little sad about this. We still have the Epilogue to go, but this is the final full chapter. I started writing this as a way keep the hope alive for Alex & Izzie while they've been pretty well ruined on the show. But what was originally supposed to be a 3 or 4 chapter story grew into this. I've loved taking this journey, and I'm very glad that you all took it with me. Some of you have asked what's next for me writing-wise. The answer to that is … I'm not sure. I have to write when the inspiration hits. I might get hit with an idea tomorrow. I'm not sure if it would be in the form of a sequel to this one or whether it would be a totally different scenario. But I hope you'll all be around for the next adventure._

_Now, on with the chapter. Will Alex and Izzie FINALLY figure things out? Read on and find out. Oh, and I don't own the song (Wham! gets that, um, honor ;) ) … **Let me know your over-all thoughts on the story in your fabulous reviews!**_

* * *

_"You take the grey skies out of my way_  
_You make the sun shine brighter than Doris Day  
Turned a bright spark into a flame ..."_

The slightly off-key singing brought Alex out of his deep sleep. He glanced at the clock next to his bed and groaned. The two hours of sleep he had gotten didn't begin to repair the exhaustion that had been caused by the 22 hours he had just spent at the hospital. Sure, there was a bridge accident and many people, including a school bus full of kids, had needed emergency surgery. He couldn't have left the hospital any earlier if he tried. But at that moment, all he wanted was sleep, and that wouldn't happen with Izzie's voice echoing down the hall.

Crawling out of his bed, he rubbed his eyes as he moved toward the nursery. What he found there was nothing unusual or out of the ordinary. But the silvery moon creeping in through the edge of the blinds mixed with the soft golden glow of the rubber ducky night light outlining his ex-wife and his child pulled at his heart.

_"Wake me up before you go-go_  
_Don't leave me hanging on like a yo-yo  
Wake me up before you go-go ..."_

Two-week-old Caleb was laying against his mother's chest, looking up into her adoring eyes. For her part, Izzie was lightly dancing him around the room, looking at the baby with so much love, it practically oozed out of every ounce of her being. The button down shirt, that he was certain was taken from his closet, and black yoga pants she was wearing did little to hide the leftover baby pudge around her middle. But despite the extra pounds, her clothes or the mess of curls pulled sloppily off of her face ... at that moment, he couldn't imagine anyone more beautiful.

_"I don't want to miss it when you hit that high  
Wake me up before you go-g-- _Alex!!!" she cried as she turned around. "God! You scared me. What are you doing up?"

He smirked at her as he leaned against the door frame. "Well, right now, I'm seriously beginning to question your taste in music. Wham? Really, Iz?"

"Shut up!" She rolled her eyes and smiled. "There was a 'best of the '80s' CD infomercial on TV and it got stuck in my head." Her eyes widened. "Oh, God. Did I wake you up? I'm so sorry, Alex. He was getting fussy and I didn't want him to start crying and disturb you. I guess I didn't realize how loud I was being ..."

"It's fine. I'm off for the next three days, so I'll get sleep eventually." He moved into the room closer to her, pressing a light kiss to his son's head. He looked up and met her eyes and for a moment neither one could move. Everything just stopped. It struck him at that very moment. He loved this woman. More than almost anything in the world, besides the baby they had created together, he loved her.

He'd been fighting this feeling for so many months, it surprised him that it hit him so quietly. He couldn't fight anymore. Now that he was aware that he still loved her, it was a battle he didn't want to win. He wanted to surrender to what he felt.

The spell was broken when a whimper became a full-on wail from Caleb's mouth. "Uh, I guess he's hungry," she said, clearly unsure of what that moment had meant. But it was obvious she felt it too. "Could, um, you grab me a burp cloth from the drawer." He nodded, still silenced by his epiphany, and did as he was asked. "Thanks." He watched as she sat down in the rocking chair, unbuttoned her shirt and placed their son to her breast.

Alex sat down on the ottoman and watched the suckling child and the woman who broke his heart, and found what he had been longing for all of his life. A family. His family. His throat tightened as he tried to keep his emotions in tact. His mind wanted him to remember the past. To dwell on the things that he and Izzie had said and done to each other so long ago, but those memories had long since faded. His heart wanted the right here and now, with just the three of them.

"Alex? Are you okay?"

Her voice pulled him from his thoughts. "Um. Yeah. Great actually."

"Because I can do this. You can go back to sleep. And I promise not to sing anymore."

"Well, I'm going to hold you to that, sleep or not." He chose to ignore the glare she sent in his direction. "But I think we should talk."

"Oh. Okay. About what?" The concern in her voice was evident.

He took a deep breath and locked his hazel eyes with her brown ones. "Us."

She adjusted the hungry child in her arms and, not trusting her own voice, nodded at him to proceed.

"I never thought I'd be able to love anyone again, Iz. Not after what you did to me. I told you once that I wouldn't survive losing you. I did. You didn't give me any choice, but I survived anyway. But I've just been existing. Until you showed up at the hospital asking for a baby, I was just moving from day to day focusing on work and only work. The rest of it lost importance. I wasn't living. I was just ... there. But you're back. I feel like I'm finally living again. And the only thing that connects then and now is you."

"Alex, what --"

"I love you. Maybe somewhere deep down inside, I never stopped. I can't tell for sure. I know that I've been fighting a losing battle for months trying to keep you at arms length. Trying to not let myself get attached. But I can't do it anymore. I know that telling you this may ruin everything. But you deserve to know. Despite all the crap from back then, I love you now more than I ever could have the first time around."

Izzie looked at him, shocked expression on her blushed face. At that moment, Caleb finished eating and immediately burped. Izzie broke eye contact with Alex, looking down at the child in her lap. Without saying a word, she patted him a few more times on the back, bringing about another burp. Before he knew what was happening, she had passed the baby off to him, and was walking out of the room. "Can you put him down?" she asked not waiting for an answer.

Too stunned to move, Alex pressed his son against his chest, rubbing his back softly. "Hey, little guy. I think I pissed off your mom. I may be doing okay at this dad thing so far, but I suck when it comes to dealing with her. Trust me, when you get older you'll understand." The only response he got was a yawn. "Okay, back to bed." Alex stood and lay Caleb in his crib, gently kissing him again. "What ever happens, kid, I love you." He turned on the mobile over the crib and quietly slipped out of the nursery.

Not sure where Izzie was, he checked her bedroom first. But it was empty. He moved to look in her bathroom, but as he was doing so, he heard a clanging in the kitchen. Facing away from him, and clearly flustered, she vigorously stirred whatever kind of batter she had thrown together in the last five minutes. Not making his presence known, he walked up behind her and pulled the spoon and bowl from her hands. He turned her toward him, effectively blocking any escape she might attempt. Tears were falling from her eyes.

"Alex!"

"Izzie, stop it. You're avoiding."

She looked away from him, but he wasn't having it. He reached up, put his hands to her cheeks and moved her face so she had no choice but to meet his intense stare. "I'm scared, Alex," was all she could whisper.

"Scared? About what?!" He knew his voice had gotten louder. Too loud. He hated himself for yelling at her, but the pent up frustration of her blowing him off had pushed him to that point. He breathed in a few times and lowered his voice again. "I just poured my heart out to you in there, Iz. You don't think I was scared. Sometimes you just have to take that chance. Jump without a net, remember? Now, take a chance and tell me what the problem is."

"I'm not scared of the fact that you told me you love me," she sighed, emotion drenching her voice. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear those words come out of your mouth again. _You _aren't what's scaring me. I'm scared that I'm going to screw it up like before, Alex! And it won't just be screwing it up for you and me. But Caleb, too."

"Iz, you told me the night that we decided to go ahead with the IVF that you weren't that same girl I married. That you had grown up. I believed you then and I believe you now. You can do this. I want you to do this. I want us to be a family. A real family. The family that I never had until you walked back into my life. So tell me, right now, if there is any chance you can love me back."

Her chin quivered as she fought the emotions surging through her. "I do, Alex. I've always have, even when I thought I hated you. I just don't see how you can still love me after everything we've been through. Everything I put you through."

He moved closer to her, his face hovering mere inches from hers."Forgotten. From now on, it's just you and me and Caleb. And what happened back then doesn't matter. Do you think you can do that too?" He wrapped his arms around her, pulled her close and breathed her in.

She nodded, unable to speak, burying her face into his bare chest. Her arms wound around him tentatively at first. As her grip tightened gradually, her tears flowed freely and she struggled to breathe. "I love you," she finally whispered. "So, so much."

She finally looked up into his hazel eyes. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers and in that moment they found each other and they found what they'd been missing for so long. Love, completely and simply, without shadows of the past clouding over them. That past was, in a moment, erased and their future looked unbelievably, unexpectedly bright.

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_So, that's it folks! Look for the Epilogue soon!_

_**REVIEWS PLEASE!!!**_


	25. Epilogue

**AGAIN**

_Epilogue_

_**You know I want reviews, even for this tiny epilogue! **_

_*****Big announcement at the end of this. Be sure to check it out!*****_

* * *

The sun shone brilliantly on the hill top over looking the city. It was a warm spring day caressed by the breeze blowing off the bay. The small gathering was simple. Well thought out, but not over the top. Not anything like the last time.

Gathered around, their friend's faces shone with love and support, and the occasional smug, 'I knew they'd find their way back' look. He stood there in the middle of the crowd waiting for her. He had spent so much of his life waiting on her and now was no different. But there was no fear now. No insecurities. No vulnerability. Just the overwhelming feeling that this was right. It took a second, third and fourth try, but it was right.

She appeared at the top of the porch steps, in a simple white lace gown carrying a small bouquet of wildflowers. Holding her other hand was their nearly two-year-old son. He tugged on her arm to move down the stairs. She knew that he saw daddy waiting for them and he wanted to hurry to get to him. As the pair descended her smile lit up as she thought back over the past few years. How things had changed. How they were so different this time. How this was all, in some crazy way, the perfect life. Unconventional, sure. But perfect.

About halfway to the crowd in the yard, the boy let go of her hand and took off full speed toward his father. He picked up the boy with ease and spun him around like he had so many times before in their backyard. A laugh passed through her lips and she ran to catch up to her boys. The man she loved held out a hand for her. Their fingers intertwined as he pressed a kiss to her cheek and they stood there as a family.

There was no minister, and they had taken care of the legal part the week before at the courthouse. This was just about them. The words they spoke to each other and the promises they made were spoken straight from the heart. Neither one of them shied away from what happened to them the first time, but they each pledged to make it right the second. His words were honest and heartfelt, the words that could only come from a man truly in love. Her's were tear-filled and emotional. Not emotion borne out of panic or fear, but the emotion of finding your way back to the love of your life.

Sealing it with a kiss they turned and looked at those around them, those who had seen them at their best and at their worst. Each and every smile was a reassurance that this was exactly the way things should turn out.

Later that night, Alex and Izzie lay wrapped in each other's arms in the silence of the honeymoon they never had the first time around.

"Alex?"

"Hmm?"

Izzie knew that now was as good a time as any to bring up their future ...

"I want to have another baby."

... again.

* * *

**THE END ...**

**But I've been thinking about it, and decided that I'm not ready to be done with this story yet. Therefore, I started working on the plot for the sequel. … IF you, the reader, are interested. Are you?**

**I've got it pretty well planned, but I think I want to get quite a bit written before I start posting. But if you all want it, then I'll get to work. Let me know how you feel about the sequel!**


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